There Is No "I" In Private
Chapter Three
By Missy

SERIES: Goosebumps!
SUBSERIES: There is no "I" in Private
PART: three of undetermined parts for this arc
Author: Missy
Email: lasfic@yahoo.com
RATING: PG-13 (For language, anatomical refferences)
PAIRING(s): L/L; S/C; S/R

DISTRIBUTION: To LW, Kai, and FG so far; any other archives are welcome to ask (Please Email Me), but disclaimers must be included, my email left intact. send a URL, and provide full disclaimers as well as credit me fully. Please inform me if you are going to submit my work to any sort of search engine. Please do not submit my work to a search engine that picks out random sets of words and uses them as key words, such as "Google"

Please contact me in order for this story to be placed on an archive, or if you want know of a friend who would enjoy my works, please email me their address and I will mail them the stories, expressly for the purpose of link trading. MiSTiers are welcomed! Please do inform me that you'd like to do the MiSTing, however, and send me a copy of the finished product. I'd also love to archive any MiSTings that are made of my work!

DISCLAIMER: Laverne and Shirley, of course, not my property and belongs to its creators.

CATEGORY: Epic Drama
CANNON/SPOILERS: Pre-Reunion Show Cannon; set five years after the series' conclusion.
FEEDBACK: PLEASE?!
SPOILLER/SUMMARY: Laverne and Lenny try to cope with life under the gaze of royal watchers, who begin to impede upon their honeymoon. Meanwhile, Shirley becomes desperate to safeguard her custody of Veenie, and Rhonda gets some long-awaited news.
NOTES: The first chapter in the eighth portion to this series. For previous chapters, see the Goosebumps! Section at LAS Fic or The Look.

Kath has written a lovely wedding night within the cannon for these two; see Impure Thoughts to read it!

And yes, I couldn't quite figure out how to spell the name of Lenny's sovereign mini-nation, so I improvise.


***

Lenny stared at the rain dripping off his windowsill. He and Laverne were very tired, very happy, and very ready to leave that room.

"We ain't leavin' yet." Laverne said. "They ain't puttin' these sheets up for the whole world to see!

A reasonable idea, less in action.

"I have to go to the bathroom." He said.

"Len, only quitters go to the bathroom."

He stared at her, horrified, and she backed down. "I think there's a chamber pot underneath the bed."

"Turn around."

"Why?"

"Cause I can't go with you lookin'!"

"Hey, you did a lot more with me lookin!"

Lenny pouted, "That ain't funny."

She turned around, and when he completed his business, he returned to bed.

"Well, whattya wanna do now?"

He thought for a moment. "Ya know, there was this one thing, in one of Squiggy's magazine's..."

"If it has to do with Squig," she said, her nose wrinkling, "I ain't gonna do it!"

"Aww! It's really cool! You put your knee here, and my elbow there...."

Their conversation was cut off by the sound of a drill running.

A drill which began pushing the deadbolts from the door.

***

"Oh, Carmine, what am I going to do?"

Carmine thought for a moment. "Walter...can he take the kid away, if you're married to some guy?"

She sniffled. "It may be harder."

"Well," he knelt, "if it'll help, you can marry me."

Her reaction was a sharp, harsh laugh.

"No."

"Shirl, I don't think you've got much of a choice."

"I have plenty of choices! I'll call a lawyer!"

"But this'd be better?"

"Being married to a drunk?"

He glared, grabbing her by the arm. "Shirl, I'm very serious. Marry me."

She thought for a long moment before opening her mouth with a firm...

To Part 2

To Part 4