Chapter 9: Bread, Water, & A New Cellmate
By MsConanOBrien


Chapter 9: Bread, Water, & A New Cellmate

Just as Lenny & Squiggy were about to leave the room, two big security men huddled around them. They asked for their IDs and then arrested them.
"This is sexual harassment! And I will not stand for this!" Squiggy shouted, as he was being frisked for weapons.
"Ya uh.. I dont frisk on a first date." Lenny said goofily.
The security men rolled their eyes and continued to arrest them. They placed them into the car and drove to the local police station.
"Squiggy, I dont wanna die." Lenny said, getting scared of being in jail.
"Relax Len. All theys gonna do is lectocute us." Squiggy assured.
Lenny sighed in relief as he and Squiggy were taken in for their mugshots.
"I really wish you guys had notified us that we's was being photographed. I didnt even have time to fix my hair." Squiggy said.
There pictures were taken- much to Squiggys refusal, and it was on to the fingerprints. When everything was finally done, they were put into suits and into the cell.
"Gee Officer. Do these stripes make me look pregnant?" Lenny asked.
"No." The Officer said.. getting annoyed by the two dumb convicts.
Lenny & Squiggy walked around in their new cell and looked at their new roomates.
"Let me introduce ourselves," Squiggy said, standing next to Lenny. "My name is Andrew Squiggman and this *points* is Lenny Kosnowski. We enjoy BOSCO, moths, saurkraut, and beautiful woman. We work as truck drivers at the Shotz Brewery and are currently involved with two girls, Laverne DeFazio and Shirley Feeney."
"Nobody cares!" One man shouted from the corner.
"Wait! You guys work at the brewery?" Another chimed in.
"Thats what we said dumbhead!" Squiggy shouted back. That annoyed the man and he proceeded to get up and walk towards them.
"What I meant BigFoot, was that yes, we work there! We get all the beer we want!"
"FREE BEER!" The man yelled. "So, tell us about these Laverne & Shirley girls. They any good?"
Lenny and Squiggy then bit their hand and made their grunting/moan noise.
"Are they good?! Of course theyre good!" Squiggy lied.
Squiggy went on to tell all these lies of the two girls when the officer came to bring them their dinner.
"Bread and water?" Lenny said disappointed. "Atleast when we're at home we get moldy cheese!" He ate it anyways, but kept complaining he wanted some cheese.
Lenny & Squiggy, now in their new home for now settled into their beds and went to sleep.

Chapter 10: Ill Pay You $500 To Keep Them



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