(Okay, kids, here comes the smut! Who will Laverne turn to for comfort in this, her darkest hour?)

Carmine finally opened his apartment door. His dark curls were unkempt and his eyes were only half opened. "What?" he said, his voice low and confused from sleep.

Laverne took a deep breath, struggling to speak in a normal tone of voice. "I’m sorry to wake you. I didn’t know where else to go. Can I come in?"

Carmine yawned and rubbed at his eyes with the back of his hand. "Laverne? What are you doin’ back here? It’s gotta be one a.m.!"

"Please. Carmine...please." Her voice broke and she bit her lower lip, trying to keep the tears from starting again.

Carmine finally looked at her. Whatever he saw in her face brought him to full awareness, as he took her hand and pulled her into the apartment. Closing the door behind him, he rested both hands on Laverne’s shoulders and said, "What happened? My God, Laverne, did someone hurt you?"

She laughed, but it came out wrong. Clearing her throat, she managed, "Yeah. You could say that."

Carmine’s expression darkened. "Tell me who did it. I swear, Laverne, it’ll be the last thing he’ll ever do!"

Despite it all, her heart warmed at the sincerity in his voice, the flash of anger in his dark eyes. He really does care about me, she realized. At least I matter to one of my friends. "Calm down, champ," she said. "I didn’t mean it like that. No one hurt me, not the way you’re thinkin’."

"Then what is it?" asked Carmine, running his hand through his hair. "Laverne, why’d you come back here?"

"Because...because I can’t think of where else to go." The tears were stinging her eyes, but she blinked them away angrily. "I got no one else to talk to, no one else who might understand."

Carmine was studying her face intently. Finally, he said, "Is this about Shirley? Did you guys have it out or something?"

"Or something." She gave him extra points for reading her so well. My God, what am I doing here? This is gonna hurt him, too.

Casually brushing at her eyes, Laverne said, "Maybe this was a mistake. I should just go, let you get back to bed."

"No." He put his hand on her shoulder as she turned away. She closed her eyes, enjoying his firm, yet gentle grasp. It surprised her how comforting it was. "Laverne, obviously something’s really wrong with you. I’m your friend; you know that. There’s nothing you can’t tell me."

"I don’t want to hurt you," she whispered, turning to face him again.

He looked startled, but then smiled kindly. "I’m tough. Go on, I can take whatever it is you have to dish out." He took a deep breath, as though bracing himself. "What happened between you and Shirley?"

Don’t do this to him. The thought tumbled through her mind, competing with the images of Shirley with her arms wrapped around Lenny. Together, naked, screwing in her own bedroom. A sudden rush of anger pushed aside her grief and the words tumbled out of her mouth. "Shirley slept with Lenny tonight! She went to bed with the man she knew, she knew, I cared about and the worst thing about it is that I think she just did it to hurt me! To get back at me for the stupid, unimportant flirtation you and I enjoyed three long years ago! And right now I think I hate her. I hate her for doin’ this to me and I hate her for makin’ me hate him!"

Laverne paused, her chest heaving, as she struggled to regain control. When she’d caught her breath, she found that she actually felt a tiny bit better for having said the words aloud.

Then her eyes met Carmine’s and the relief vanished. "Carmine?" she whispered. "Are you okay?"

His eyes were wide, stunned. In the light of the single lamp that was on in his apartment, they looked almost black. His expression was unreadable, filled with so many emotions it was impossible for her to decipher them all. Hurt, certainly. Shock, absolutely. But also a deep sorrow, coupled with a rage like she’d never realized he was capable of. As his eyes locked onto hers, she took an involuntary step away from him.

He moved quickly, grabbing both her shoulders, effectively pinning her in place. His grip now was anything but comforting. In deep, measured tones, he asked, "Are you telling me that Shirley Feeney, the woman who has teased me for years now, who told me over and over again that she was waiting for marriage, the good little girl...." He stopped, swallowing hard. When he continued, his voice was shaking. "Are you honestly saying that she tossed her prized virginity away on Lenny Kosnowski?"

"I...yeah. I am. Carmine...I wouldn’t lie...."

"You made a mistake," he said, cutting her off.

"Excuse me?"

"You. Made. A. Mistake." Carmine shook his head. "No, there’s no way you saw what you think you saw. She wouldn’t, not over a misunderstanding. Not with another man...."

"Well she did!" The heat in her own voice surprised Laverne. She jerked sharply away from Carmine as the anger threatened to overwhelm her. "I’m sorry to disappoint you, but Miss Perfect, your little madonna, used her not-so-secret weapon tonight!"

"No!" Carmine shouted, his hands clenching into fists. "She wouldn’t do that!"

"She did!" Laverne cried. "I saw her, Carmine! What do you think? I’d run up here and tell you this if I wasn’t sure? I saw her – them – in bed together! Naked, rollin’ around, gigglin’ and livin’ it up! I guess Len’s a little more experienced than I gave him credit for, too!" The tears were flowing again, but she was too infuriated to try and stop them.

Carmine grabbed a mug off the coffee table and hurled it against the wall with an enraged cry. Laverne jumped and moved out of his reach again. "I can’t believe this!" he yelled. "I can’t believe...all those times she turned me on and then turned me away, and this is what she gives it up for? Revenge?"

Laverne shrank back against the wall as Carmine began throwing whatever he could get his hands on around the apartment. He flung a shoe against the window and she heard the glass crack. Then he turned back to her, his eyes fiery, bare chest heaving, an expression almost animalistic on his face. She gasped as he crossed the room with alarming speed, then slammed his right fist into the wall, right next to her head. "So what do you think I should do about this, hm?" he asked, his voice menacing. "Come on, Laverne. You came to me for help, didn’t you? That’s what I’m for, Carmine the helper, Carmine who comes through for his girls in a pinch, Carmine the predictable boyfriend. Go on, you can tell me. Why'd you come to me?"

"I...I thought you had a right to know," she stammered, her eyes flicking to the left.

He followed her look, then planted his left hand next to the other side of her head, trapping her against the wall. "Well, now I know. Thanks. What now?" His voice seemed to catch in his throat and she saw, underneath the fury, his pain. It was deep, deeper than she expected. Maybe deeper than her own.

Suddenly, she pushed away from the wall, until her face was almost touching his, their breath mingling. Fixing his gaze with her own, she said, "You’re right. I came here wanting your help with this."

He nodded, eyes narrowing. "What shall it be, then? You want me to beat Len to a bloody pulp? Or Shirley?" He chuckled, a discomfiting sound. "Name your revenge, Laverne. Because right now, I’m pretty prepared to do whatever you want."

"There’s more than one way to get revenge," she said, her voice husky. She could smell his aftershave, mingled with sweat. The musky combination was overwhelming, exciting. She let her eyes run over his solid chest, follow the cords of muscles in his tensed arms. She returned her eyes to his and saw them widen slightly, first in surprise, then in understanding.

He grabbed her again, pushed her hard against the wall, and smothered her lips with his. She responded in kind, entwining her fingers in his hair, pulling him closer as her tongue thrust into his mouth. He grunted, then put his arms around her and lifted her feet clear off the ground. She wrapped her legs around his waist and he carried her to the sofa, their tongues teasing, dancing within the confines of their locked mouths.

She was on her back and he was astride her. He pulled back and, with incredible ease, ripped her blouse apart. She knew it should have made her angry – the blouse was one of her favorites – but it only enflamed her more. She felt a pulsing between her legs, a surge of heat that yearned for satisfaction. As Carmine slipped her bra over her head and tossed it away, she threw her head back and thrust her breasts toward him, eager for his touch.

His hands cupped her breasts, more gently than she wanted. Then she felt his mouth on her left nipple, tongue flicking against it until it was achingly erect. She writhed, then grabbed his head and forced it down, harder. He read her need unerringly and squeezed her unoccupied right breast as he playfully nibbled on her left nipple. The sudden, sharp pain only heightened her pleasure and she moaned in gratitude.

"Wait," she whispered, pushing his head up. He obeyed; his face flushed crimson. She smiled as she reached for his waist and yanked his sweatpants down. He kicked them away, started to mount her again, but she stopped him with a firm hand against his chest. "Allow me," she said, sliding off the sofa onto her knees.

He smiled back, all lust and excitement, as he sat back on the sofa. She spread his strong thighs apart and took his stiffness into her mouth. He gasped as she sucked, drawing him all the way in to the base of his dick. Laverne couldn’t help but feel a surge of pride; this was where doing "everything but" made her an expert. She ran her tongue up the length of him, then teased his tip until he was clutching at the sofa, groaning, begging her for more. Then she took him in again, sucking, her throat accommodating his entire, pleasantly impressive length.

A thought from the back of her mind; unbidden and unwanted: Len would have loved this. I’ll bet he never got it as good from anyone. Now, he never will. She pulled back, giving her head a sharp shake, trying to rid it of Lenny and focus on the man she was with. As she released him, Carmine hissed, "Don’t stop, God, please don’t stop! I’m so close...."

"I know," she replied, soothingly. She rose slowly to her feet. "I want you inside me when it happens."

He raised his head to meet her eyes. "What? Laverne, are you sure?"

She responded by slowly undulating her hips as she stripped off her skirt, then shimmying out of her pantyhose. He nodded approvingly as he watched. "I’m sure, Carmine," she said. "Don’t worry, I’ve been takin’ the Pill for years to regulate...stuff. I’m not stupid."

"Good," he replied, hoarsely. "Because I am, right now. There’s not a drop of blood left in my brain." He took a deep breath, then reached for her, his hands encircling her waist. "My God, you have a gorgeous body." He ran his hands up and down and she shuddered in response.

"Right back at you," she breathed. She placed her knees on either side of his and raised her hips. Grasping the base of his cock, she guided him into her dripping wet pussy.

He groaned, deep in his throat, then put his hands on her lower back. "I might hurt you at first," he said, obviously using the last of his control not to drive into her.

She held his face in her hands and kissed him before replying, "I love it that you care. But don’t. You don’t need to be caring tonight. Besides, there’s not much blockin’ the way, if you know what I mean."

It was all he needed to hear. Releasing the last of his self-control, he thrust up into her. She gasped as her thin hymen snapped, the brief, sharp pain a momentary distraction. It quickly faded though as he guided her up and down, the rhythmic thrusting fueling her fire. She rode him, tentatively at first, then with greater and greater abandon, relishing his hardness against her throbbing clit, loving how completely he filled her inside. She let her head loll back, then raised it again to look into his face.

Carmine’s eyes were half-closed, his breath escaping in bursts from between his slightly parted lips. "You’re amazing," he murmured. "You’re a goddamn goddess!"

Whether he meant it or not, it was good to hear. And judging from the naked pleasure that contorted his handsome features, he did, at least at this very moment. That’s right, she thought. This is what a real woman feels like. This is what a real woman can do for a man.

Suddenly, he stopped moving. Before she could protest, he wrapped his arms around her and lifted, then lowered her to the floor, still inside her. He was on his knees, his face right above hers. "Let me do the driving now," he whispered, leaning down to nuzzle her ear.

Barely able to breathe, she nodded her assent, spreading her legs wide as her arms encircled his neck. He kissed her again, open mouth moist and soft against her own, and he began to thrust again – long, slow – filling her with agony. The pressure, the heat, rose from her engorged genitals and washed through her body, making her feel like she was being pricked by thousands of needles at once. Her need was overwhelming; as much as she didn’t want this to end, she couldn’t wait any longer.

"Faster," she hissed. "Fast...and hard."

He smiled, a wicked, dirty grin. Then he complied, driving into her like a man possessed. His hands clasped hers, pinning her arms up over her head as he rammed into her, so deeply she felt him against her bones, in and out, faster and faster, his eyes locked on hers, daring her, begging her, threatening her to come.

She felt a powerful surge that seemed to set her pussy ablaze. She hovered somewhere out of the world, doused in the agony of pain and pleasure for a few precious moments. Her entire body arched upward as though hit with an electrical current. Then the orgasm blinded her as the searing waves crashed through her body, making her cry out and writhe helplessly. The release went on forever, until finally, finally, she could breathe again. She lay motionless, sobbing a little, but not from sorrow or hurt anymore. All her emotional pain had been washed away by her complete, raw satisfaction.

A gasp from Carmine brought her eyes open and she smiled as he thrust into her one last time, relieving his own need now that she had taken her pleasure. He closed his eyes and flung his head back, groaning and panting as he released his juice into her already overflowing warmth. She felt him pulsing inside of her and reached up to stroke his hair, enjoying his pleasure nearly as much as she had relished her own.

He collapsed on top of her, breathing heavily, his warm, hard body a comforting weight on top of her. She held him close and together they struggled to catch their breaths and come back to reality, or at least part of the way.

Finally, Carmine rolled off of her with a quiet apology. "Didn’t mean to squash you, there."

"You didn’t," she reassured him. They were side by side now, limbs pressed together on one side while their free hands continued to roam and explore one another.

He swallowed, then said, "No regrets?"

She smiled. "Not yet, anyway." At the look of dismay in his eyes, she quickly added, "No, Carmine. None at all. I loved every second of it, really. Wasn’t it obvious?"

He grinned. "If you were faking it, you oughta be in Hollywood." She laughed. "Good. I like to hear you laugh." He caressed her cheek. "You should always be happy, Laverne. You deserve that." He looked away, his smile fading.

"What?" she asked, cupping his chin and turning his face back to hers. "Carmine, what is it?"

"It’s just...you know...you need to know...." He took a deep breath. "This wasn’t about love. I don’t want you to misunderstand and I don’t want to hurt your feelings. God knows they’ve been trampled on enough for one night. But I don’t want to lead you on here."

She shushed him, pressing her fingertips against his lips. "It’s okay. I know. I’m not in love with you, either." She winked at him. "Not that I can’t imagine it happening, not after the way you made me feel tonight."

"Laverne...."

"Relax," she said. "I’m messin’ with you. We both know what this was."

"Do we?" He turned onto his side, resting the side of his face against his hand. "You mind telling me, ‘cause I’m not entirely sure myself."

"This was – comfort. And a little revenge against two people who hurt us. And, yeah, maybe more than a little mutual lust, that’s been simmering for three long years."

"I have been curious, you know, since then," he admitted. "Wondering what it would be like. What we’d be like, together, like this." He chuckled. "Never on my best days did I imagine it would be this amazing."

"Me neither," she said, kissing him softly. "Thank you, Carmine."

"Thank you." His eyes were troubled again. "Now what, though? What do we...."

"No," she said. "No, don’t think about it now. I can’t do it; I’m too drained. For tonight, let’s let it just be about you and me and a great time together. As for the rest...well, like Scarlett O’Hara always said, "I’ll worry about it tomorrow."

"Works for me," said Carmine. His eyes were nearly shut, not from pleasure anymore. "You want to sleep here tonight?"

"Oh, yeah," she murmured, snuggling closer to him. "I can’t imagine standin’ up, let alone walkin’ back home."

"No problem." He reached over to the sofa and pulled down a handy afghan, covering them both. Wrapping his arms around her, he laid back and closed his eyes. "Goodnight, Laverne."

"G’night," she mumbled, barely awake. Sated and exhausted, she put her head on his bare chest and let herself drift off in the comfort of his arms.

***

Morning came all too soon. Laverne awoke as soon as the sunlight streaming through the cracked window of Carmine’s apartment struck her eyes. She sat up and stretched languorously, then look back down at her sleeping partner.

Carmine was curled up on his side, one hand clutching the afghan that was resting modestly over his midriff, the other arm outstretched as if reaching for her. He was breathing slowly, deeply, wholly undisturbed by the light.

I guess I really wore him out, she thought, a little smugly. She stood up, then began rummaging around for the remains of her clothes. She was just wondering what to do for a shirt when a drowsy voice from the floor said, "Where’d you go?"

"I’m right here," she said, walking back around the sofa and smiling down at Carmine. "I was tryin’ not to wake you."

"It’s probably time for me to get up anyway," he said. Yawning, he sat up and looked around. "Damn, I shouldn’t have thrown that clock last night. What time is it?"

She shrugged. "Six or so, I guess. Sun’s just up."

"Oh." He started to stand, then sat down abruptly.

Laughing, Laverne asked, "Are you shy all of a sudden? C’mon, you ain’t got nothin’ I didn’t see up close and personal last night!" She gave him a sly look. "Besides, you definitely don’t have anything to be embarrassed about."

He smiled in an endearingly shy way. "That’s awfully nice of you to say." He rose to his feet, wrapping the afghan around his waist anyway. He regarded her from head to toe with approval. "Wow. You have an amazing body, do you know that?"

She giggled. "I never thought of myself like that." She quickly pulled on her pantyhose, frowning at a run in the thigh, then tugged on her skirt.

"I’m not just saying that, you know." He walked over to her and put his hand lightly against her face.

She closed her eyes and pressed against his palm. "I wish I didn’t have to go to Shotz today."

"You’re gonna tell her, ain’t you." He said it calmly, like it was a foregone conclusion.

Laverne opened her eyes and sighed, bending over to put on her bra. "You got a top I can wear until I get back to my apartment?" she asked.

Carmine nodded, then disappeared into his bedroom. A few minutes later he returned; shirt in hand, a pair of jeans restoring his decency. She took the shirt and pulled it on, tucking it into her shirt. It didn’t fit right, but it would get her home. "Thanks."

"My pleasure." He sat down on the sofa, staring at his bare feet. "You didn’t answer my question."

"It didn’t sound like you were askin’ one." She shrugged. "Okay, yeah, if you wanna know, I was kinda plannin’ to toss it in Shirl’s face. Along with a fist or two, to be totally honest." She waited, wondering how he would try to stop her.

Carmine looked up at her and smiled, briefly. "Enjoy it," he said.

She blinked. "So, you don’t mind?"

"Only that I won’t be there to watch you. Whatever the hell I had with Shirley ended last night, when she fucked Lenny." He stood up and she saw that the rage that had been in his eyes last night was still there, only now it had receded into something icier and even more disturbing. "I treated that girl like a queen, Laverne. Oh, sure, I had a couple other girlfriends, but never anything serious. Certainly nothing I hid from Shirl...I was always honest about it. And she didn’t want us to go steady, she told me that all the time. But when it came to intimacy, she swore she wouldn’t, couldn’t cross that line. I respected her for that, Laverne, and I never pressured her...well, not beyond testing the waters a couple of times. When she said no, I backed off." She saw the muscles in his jaw tighten. "I didn’t screw a single other girl while Shirl and I dated, Laverne. I went out, I made out, but I held back, because of her."

Laverne’s eyes widened. "You’re kiddin’ me! Are you tellin’ me last night was your first time, too?"

He blushed a little, lowering his head with a sheepish grin. "No, of course not. Look, whenever Shirley and I broke up, and that’s happened a few times along the line as you know, all bets were off. But while we were on, I may as well have been a virgin."

"Wow." Laverne nodded. "No wonder you’re so pissed."

"Yeah, well, that’s why I don’t care if you tell her. I want her to hurt, the way I do." He looked back at her, as if defying her to call him on his pettiness.

"Alright. If you’d like, I’ll tell you all about it afterward."

"That’s very thoughtful." He seemed to consider it, then shook his head. "Nah. Forget it. I’d rather not hear her name again, not for a long time."

"Suit yourself. At least you don’t have to live with her." Laverne considered this. What she did today would very likely change the course of her life – certainly her living arrangements. There was no way she could continue to room with a woman who had abused her trust so thoroughly. Their friendship would end. Hell, who was she kidding? It ended last night, when she took the man Laverne had only begun to realize she wanted so very much. She’d done it for nothing, for a misunderstanding, over a harmless attraction that had never gone beyond first base. Well, now she’ll at least have good reason to hurt, Laverne thought with grim satisfaction. I screwed her man blind. Let her stick that in her pipe and smoke it.

Laverne walked over to the door. Her hand rested on the knob as she looked back over her shoulder at Carmine. "You helped me more than you know last night, Carmine," she said. "I’m grateful, I really am."

He gave her a mock salute. "That’s what I’m here for," he said, more than a little sarcastically. "To help damsels in distress."

She nodded, then opened the door. Glancing up and down the silent hallway, she stepped outside, only to be stopped by Carmine’s hand on her shoulder. After she turned to him again, he cupped her face in his hands and kissed her tenderly on the lips. "You helped me, too," he whispered.

"This won’t happen again, will it," she said, staring deeply into his dark eyes.

He shook his head, despite the regret in his eyes. "Probably not. But for the record, I’m glad it did. You were magnificent." He gave her one last, longing look, then stepped back inside. She heard him close the door quietly as she turned away and walked to the stairs. She ran the tip of her tongue over her lips, tasting him one last time. Then she went to face the rest of her day.

***

When she woke up alone in her bedroom that morning, Shirley’s first thought was, oh, good, it worked. This was immediately followed by such a rush of self-loathing that she nearly vomited.

Dressing for her day, Shirley felt a hollowness in the pit of her stomach. Lenny would have told Laverne everything by now, the truth as she had spun it to him. Obviously, she had forgiven him and they had spent the night together – where else would she be? But Shirley knew the real truth, the true reason for putting on the show last night with Lenny. Laverne wasn’t stupid; she knew it, too. That had been obvious with a single look last night; her face shocked and wounded before she fled the apartment. Last night, that pain had made Shirley’s soul giddy. Today, in the cold light of reason, it weighed her spirit down like filth.

"I hurt my best friend," she said to herself. "I took the biggest secret she ever confided in me and I used it to bash her over the head. I am a sick, sad, woman."

No you aren’t, she tried to convince herself. Laverne betrayed you first, took your man. But had she? Really, what proof did she have that Carmine and Laverne were involved? A barely-overheard conversation, some rather awkward hand-holding she’d witnessed. Not exactly the same as catching your closest friend and the man you care about humping in your own home. Shirley bit her lower lip, tears stinging the corners of her eyes.

"How will I ever face you?" she murmured.

As if on cue, she heard the door to their apartment open. Shirley fought the urge to flee and instead stepped out of the bedroom.

Laverne was standing there, oddly dressed in her skirt and a man’s short sleeved shirt. Her hair was disheveled, her makeup gone. The expression on her face nearly stopped Shirley’s heart.

"Good morning," Laverne said flatly. "Did you have a good night’s rest?"

Shirley had to clear her throat twice before she could respond. "Fine. Just fine. Yourself?"

Laverne gave her a bitter smile. "I had a terrific night. Of course, there wasn’t much rest involved."

"Well." Shirley began bustling around the room, straightening the sofa cushions, wiping dust off the lamp. Anything to keep from standing and facing her friend, her victim. "That’s...good?"

"Oh, it was better than good," sneered Laverne. "It was amazing. You don’t know what you’ve been missin’, Shirley."

"So. Lenny obviously told you the truth. That’s good." She forced herself to stand still and face Laverne as she came down the stairs into the living room. "Then you understand now, there was no real harm done."

"Lenny? What makes you think I saw Len again last night?" Laverne arched an eyebrow. "Couldn’t get him to spend the whole night with you, huh."

Shirley gave a short laugh. "Oh, come on. Like that was gonna happen." She sobered, then said, "Laverne, I’m glad, I really am, that you two are finally together. I know what I did was – extreme – but at least...."

"What?" Laverne looked genuinely shocked. "What in the hell would make you think Len and I were together?"

"Well...well...I just assumed. I mean, you didn’t come home last night. Aw, c’mon, Laverne, I know you! You went to his place and he told you it was all a big joke and you smacked him around a little before you forgave him."

Laverne was shaking her head. She raised her hands. "Whoa, slow down there, Shirl. What was a big joke? Are you actually gonna stand there and tell me that your revenge sex with the man I cared about was just one big joke to you? God, you really are evil!"

"No! No I’m not!" Shirley cried, tears trickling down her cheeks. "Okay, look, I was jealous and I wanted to stick it to you, hurt you the way you hurt me. Or at least the way I thought you did. But, for pity’s sake, you must’ve known that it was all fake. You know me too well, you know I’d never vo-de-oh-do without a ring on my finger. Certainly not with Lenny!"

Laverne froze. Her eyes widened. "You...you...." She pressed a hand against the base of her throat. "You mean you didn’t really...?"

"No, of course not! We had all our clothes on under those sheets! Which, by the way, I have to take to the laundromat after work today." She giggled nervously. "I would never, ever make love to Lenny. For goodness sakes, the only man I might ever consider giving myself to before wedlock is Carmine, and you can ask him how likely that even is."

"Then...why? Shirley, why’d you do it?" Laverne looked a bit green. "Don’t you know what you’ve done? How many people have been affected...my God!"

Shirley hung her head, feeling shame wash over her. "I know now it was wrong, so very wrong. I used our friendship to hurt you in the worst possible way. I told myself it would all be fine in the end...you’d finally ‘fess up to Lenny how you felt and you two would get together." She shook her head. "No, that’s not entirely true. I did sort of want that to happen, but not so’s you’d be happy, or at least not only because of that. I figured it was the best way to keep you away from Carmine."

"By makin’ me think you and Len slept together?" Laverne dropped onto the sofa as if all the strength had gone out of her. "Oh, Shirley. You sure miscalculated that one."

"I know I did. Laverne, when I spotted you at Carmine’s apartment last night...."

"When? When did you see me at Carmine’s! You couldn’t have seen us, the door was closed!" She looked downright panic-stricken.

"I followed you, after work. You thought I was out, but I was waiting until you left, in the coat closet. Then I tailed you to his place and I listened in on your conversation from under the stairs." She took a shaky breath. "I didn’t hear much, but then you guys came out together, and you looked so chummy...I guess I let my imagination run away from me." She looked down at Laverne in desperation. "Please, just tell me that you guys weren’t looking for me so he could dump me for you. If you tell me, I’ll believe you."

Laverne just looked up at her, her green eyes wide like saucers. Finally, she said, "When you saw us leave the apartment together, we were lookin’ for you. But only because we wanted to discuss this whole jealousy thing of yours, tell you it was all in your head. That was all, at that time."

Shirley felt a weight rise from her shoulders, although her heart was still burdened by her own actions. "I should have known it was something like that. It’s so hard for me to trust. My father, you know how he is. I just expect the people I love to lie to me." She started to cry. "I should have known you’d never betray me and Carmine would never hurt me, not like that. But I did willfully put a knife in your heart, no question. And I’m so sorry, Laverne, that I did that to you. I’m so very, very sorry...." She broke off, her words drowned out by sobs.

A single tear coursed down Laverne’s cheek. "My God," she whispered, over and over again. "What have I done?"

"What do you mean, you?" Shirley managed to sniffle.

"I...Shirl, I didn’t go to Lenny last night. I was so angry, if I’da seen him, I’d probably have punched his lights out."

"So, then, where were you all night?" she asked.

Laverne opened her mouth, but no sound came out. After a moment or two, she swallowed, hard, and said, "Terry Buttafuco’s. I stayed over at Terry’s."

"But your shirt?"

"Um, spilled milk and Pepsi on it. Terry lent me one…of her brother’s."

"Oh. Oh, then, Laverne, you should see Lenny. It really wasn’t his fault, none of it. He’s so simple." She shook her head sharply. "I mean, I convinced him to go along with it. He did it because he likes you, too. He really does. I used that to talk him into this, telling him it would get you to open up to him about your true feelings." She buried her face in her hands. "I am evil. Evil and mean and I was so, so wrong to do it. I know there’s no way you can forgive me...."

"I do."

Shirley stopped sobbing, wondering if she had heard correctly. "Excuse me? Did you say...."

"I said, I do. I forgive you, Shirl."

Shirley raised her tear-streaked face from her hands. "Are you serious? Do you really mean that you can find it in your heart to forgive such a cruel, unwarranted trick?"

Laverne was studying her face. For just a moment, Shirley thought she saw a profound look of guilt reflected in her green eyes, eyes that wouldn’t look straight into her own. "We all make mistakes, especially in the heat of anger," Laverne mumbled. "How can I not forgive you for somethin’ that didn’t even happen?"

"Oh, Vernie!" Shirley dropped to her knees in front of her, grasping her friend’s hands tightly. "You are so wonderful, so understanding. I don’t deserve someone like you in my life!"

Laverne drew her hands away. She still looked vaguely ill. "Let’s just pretend that last night never happened, all right? I think that would be best, for all of us."

Shirley nodded. "Agreed. And, Laverne, I swear to you on all that is holy that I will never, ever do something so wrong and so hurtful to punish you again. Especially for something you didn’t even do."

Laverne let out a strange sound, almost a sob. Then she said, "If only you’d talked to me, Shirley. If only you’d confront me and Carmine when you saw us!"

"I know. I promise, no more schemes, not against you. I’ll make this up to you, Laverne, I will."

"Stop it!" Laverne stood up and walked toward the bedroom. "I gotta change, we’re due at Shotz in less than a half hour. Just...just forget it, all of it, okay? I don’t want you to make it up, I don’t want you to keep apologizing. I just want it to go away. Got it?"

"Got it," said Shirley, standing up. She nodded hard for emphasis. "Are you gonna talk to Len now?"

"No!" Laverne exclaimed. "Just forget about that, too! Whatever happens or doesn’t happen down the line between me and Lenny is between us. You’re out of the loop, got it?"

"Okay. I understand."

Laverne emerged from the bedroom, clad in a violet blouse and new skirt, brushing her hair with quick, sharp strokes. "No. You don’t understand." She caught her breath, then reached for her purse. "And you don’t need to. Ever."

Confused, Shirley said, "Whatever you say, Laverne."

As they both headed toward the door, Laverne suddenly asked, "Are you planning on seeing Carmine tonight?"

"No, we don’t have any plans. Why?"

Laverne just nodded. "Go down and warm up the car. I’ll be out in a sec."

"Oh-kay." Shirley hesitated as she stepped into the hallway. "Is everything all right? I mean, besides...."

"Yeah. Fine." Laverne sighed. "I left my stained blouse at Terry’s and I need to give her a call to ask when I can pick it up."

"Oh, right." Shirley headed off down the hallway. She felt a little better, but couldn’t help but sense something still wasn’t right between them. "I’ll see you downstairs."

Laverne gave her a distracted wave, then closed the door behind her. Shirley went downstairs, still wondering what was going on. Not that it mattered. Laverne had forgiven her, and so easily. That was a gift from God and she wasn’t about to wreck it with stupid questions or paranoia. Never again.

***

After Shirley was gone, Laverne picked up the phone. She waited a moment until she heard a familiar, "Hello?" on the other end.

"Carmine? It’s me. Laverne." She smiled a little at his response that of course, he knew who she was. Then she cleared her throat, wiped away a lingering tear, and told him, "We have got to talk."

--END--



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