Laverne and "Roxy" are cruising around the beach for guys, Laverne is enjoying it, but is worried about Shirley...

Laverne: Look, Shirl, er, Rox. Don't ya that that we've had enough of this guy stuff, heh? Why don't we go back to the room and you can organize it some more...

Roxy: I beg your pardon??? Roxy does not organize. What do I look like to you?

Laverne starts to say "You look like my best friend Shirley" but decides against it.

Laverne: Well you could go back to the room and I could take your picture with Boo Boo Kitty...

Roxy: What in the world is a boo boo kitty?

Laverne: Never mind. Look, I'm going to go get a sno-cone, OK? Don't go to far.

Roxy (mimics): Don't go to far, she says. I'm not a child! Still that boo boo kitty person sounds familiar... (Just then she looks off into the distance and sees... drumroll please... Fonzie!)

Roxy: Who is that gorgeous guy? He looks good enough for Roxy Latuer.

"Roxy" walks up to Fonzie.

Roxy: Hello, handsome.

Fonzie: Oh, hi Shirl.

Roxy: Why does everybody keep calling me that? I am not SHIRLEY!!!

Fonzie: Whoa, easy there. If you're not Shirley, who are ya?

Roxy: Roxy Latuer, sweetheart.

Fonzie (pauses a minute, then starts laughing hysterically): Oh I get it! It's a joke, right? Very good, Shirley, you've even got that voice down. Good one, and you're never a good liar, I'm surprised you kept a straight face...

Roxy: Forget about Shirley you hunk. (gives him a little kiss on the lips)

Fonzie (in shock): Whoa, that was very... (starts to lean toward her for a kiss) bad! Very, very bad! (Starts wiping his lips off and spitting)

Roxy: Why gorgeous?

Fonzie: Because you are Carmine's girl. Rule #45 in the Fonzerelli Code, I don't take other guy's chicks.

Roxy: I want you, not Carmine.

Fonzie (trying very hard to restrain himself): I get it now, it's that Melvin guy? OK, Mel, where are ya? {From the episode where the devil's nephew Melvin has all these women tempt Fonzie, long story}

Roxy: Forget about Melvin and Carmine... (kisses him again)

Shirley starts running her fingers through his hair and telling him to forget about Shirley and Carmine.

Carmine: Hey, Fonz!

Fonzie: Carmine, I can explain...

Carmine: Great, I was hoping someone could explain where Rose, my angelface, went.

Fonzie: Huh?

Carmine: Yes, Rosie, the love of my life (looks at Shirley) Oh it's Shorty. Watch out for that one, she won't leave you alone. Rose told me that she is extremely jealous of her. Poor dear, no class. (walks off)

Fonzie: Want me to punch 'im out? How can he say those things about you?

Roxy: Oh, don't worry about it, now can we go back to what we were doing without thinking about... (look of distaste) ...him?

Fonzie: Of course...

Just then Laverne pays for her snocone and starts walking back to where she left Shirley. Laverne nearly faints when she sees them.

Laverne: Shirley! (no response) Fine! Be that way! ROXY!!!

Roxy: Look, honey, can't ya see I'm busy?

Laverne: You'll kill me, er, Shirley will kill me when she finds out what you're doing. Course, I suppose she'll never know, hey! Can I take a picture?

Roxy: Hurry up... (Laverne snaps picture. Then it hits her that Shirley, Carmine's Shirley, is nearly making out with Fonzie. Kinda stupid of her not to notice before, huh?)

Laverne: Fonzie! What are you doing? (Fonzie gives her the kind of look he always gives Richie when he says something naïve) I know what you're doin', I mean, well you know, WHY!!!???

Fonzie (to Shirley AKA Roxy): Hold on one second. (Walks over to Laverne) Look, she obviously doesn't think she's Shirley, so what she doesn't know won't hurt her. And have you seen Carmine lately? He has been very uncool.

Laverne: Yeah, I know, but, do you really think, you and Shirley...

Fonzie: ROXY has great lips. (walks off)

(This next part is a phone "convo". After Laverne stomps back to the hotel, she calls the Pizza Bowl.)

Riiiinnng

Riiiinnng

Mrs. Babbish: Hello, Pizza Bowl.

Laverne: Oh Mrs. Babbish, it's awful!

Edna: Laverne, is that you? What's awful?

Laverne: Oh, Shirley and... kiss... Fonzie... Carmine... angelface... shorty... Rosie, my love...

Edna: What? You're not making sense.

Laverne: OK, it started when Carmine fell in love with Rosie, heaven knows why, called Shirley shorty, called Rosie angelface, then Shirley stalked off, hit her head, thinks she's Roxy, starts just about makin' out with Fonzie, and Lenny is following me everywhere!!!

Edna: Well I understood ya this time, but it still doesn't make sense!

Laverne: I know, Mrs. Babbish, I called because I'm so confused! I mean, if I don't stop Shirley and Fonzie, Shirl will kill me, if I do, Fonzie will kill me, if I try to reason with Carmine Rosie will kill me, and if Lenny follows me for another day I think I'll kill myself!!!

Edna: Ok, calm down, Laverne. I wish I could help you, but you've got a pretty unique situation there! I think the best thing to do is just let things work themselves out with Rosie and Carmine, maybe he's temporarily insane. As for Shirley and Fonzie, just don't let them vodeodoh. And, Lenny, well, he's permanently insane.

Laverne: Yeah, I guess you're right. Thanks Mrs. B.

Edna: Sure. Call me with anything new! This is better than a soap opera!

Laverne: Alright, bye! Tell Pop I love 'im.

Edna: I will, bye!

(Hangs up phone)

Laverne: Boy! This has been some vacation so far!