One Of Our Wise Guys Is Missing


Written by: Scott McClenny

Squiggy disappears just before the big Christmas celebration.

"How many times do I need to tell you-No bothering Bardwell's Santa Claus!"the assistant manager had one hand on Squiggy's shoulder and the other on the door as he was speaking.

"I tell ya this is against my Constipational Rights!"Squiggy squirmed trying to get out of the grip.

Unfortunately for him this particuliar assistant manager had played offensive guard for the Rams before being hired by Bardwell's. So in the end the Irresitable Force prevailed against the Immovable Object and Squiggy ended up being deposited uncermoniously on the sidewalk.

Muttering to himself he dusted himself off and started the walk back to the bus stop.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++

"Well Pop,whaddya think?"Laverne asked as she and Shirley put the finishing touches on the creche.

"Perfect,but where are Mary and Joseph and the wise men and sheperds and angels and everything?All I see is an empty shed."

"I tried tellin'ya Pop,Shirley suggested we do a live,as in LIVE nativity scene this year;we're all gonna help out.Lenny and Squiggy and Carmine are gonna be the Three Wise Men;Sonny's gonna be Joseph and Shirley's gonna be Mary;Rhonda's gonna be the angel and she's gonna get a couple friends of hers from acting class to come be the Sheperds and we got permission from Mrs.Grompers from accounting to use her grandson for the baby Jesus,except we have ta have him back before 8 p.m."

Frank DeFazio just stared at his daugther.

"It figures Shirley be the one to play Mary,why couldn't it be you?" he lifted his hands up in frustration.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Squiggy walked around the block a couple times not wanting to get on the bus so soon.It was rather humiliating to be thrown out of the store like that,and in front of all those people.He hoped that Laverne and Shirley hadn't seen it.

But what if they HAD?

He started feeling depressed and began walking in the opposite direction. For now he didn't really care what happened,he just didn't want to be humiliated again.

+++++++++++++++++++

Cowboy Bob's was closed for the night to allow everyone involved in the Nativity to come in and dress without having to be stared at by all of the customers.

"Laverne does this make me look fat?"Shirley asked.

"Oh,for Pete Sake Shirl'"Laverne replied,"you're supposed to look that way,after all you just gave birth!"

Shirley glared at her.

"Well,I guess we can't do anything about that now."she decided,"I just saw Mrs.Grompers drive up."

At the same time Lenny and Carmine bust in the room.

"What's the matter?"

"What's up?"the girls said at the same time.

"It's Squiggy,we can't find him anywhere!"Lenny said.

to be continued.


On To Part 2







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