SERIES: Wetwired

PART: 1 of 1

RATING: NC-17 (Explicit Heterosexual Sexual Activity, Adult thematic material, language, adult content)

PAIRING(s): L/L

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CATEGORY: Romance, Birthday Fic

FEEDBACK: PLEASE?!

SETTING IN TIMELINE: AU Canon for "The Bully Show"; sequel to "Domestic Relations"

SEQUEL TO: Domestic Relations.

SPOILLER/SUMMARY: Laverne and Lenny on the third floor.  Part of Laverne's reminiscence as to how she and Lenny ended up together.

NOTES: Second of the three stories written for Shotzette's birthday in 2006.

 

***

 

"'Come on, Len!  Everyone's doing it!"

 

Lenny shook his head.  "I don't feel like going out with a couple of twins - even Swedish ones.  Not me.  You have fun with Veronica and..."

 

"Marlie!"

 

"..Carlie.  Okay?"

 

Squiggy slurred something, his tongue thick with alcohol and indistinguishable, and Lenny closed the door with a sigh.  He had never seen Squiggy so in the cups, and he hoped the bubble head he was dating had the sense to get him home safe.  Once Squiggy had an idea in his head it was impossible to keep him home, but the idea of double-teaming two girls had lost a lot of appeal in the past month.  Squiggy didn't care, of course - going on a date with two girls at once made him taller than Fonzie in his mind.  He probably disapproved of Lenny's staying home alone and brooding over Laverne...

 

Laverne.  The idea of that blonde was immediately less appealing.

 

It had all gone so well at first - they had been having real fun on their date, drunk as they were.  They even got to sing together, which was fun until they were pitched out of the restaurant.  Then one thing had led to another and....

 

***

 

"...And that's why you can't go out tonight!"

 

Shirley Feeney gave her roommate a pitying look as she tossed on her coat.  "Carmine and I have had these tickets for three weeks!"  Laverne simpered, sticking out her bottom lip and making "the Boo Boo Face".  "Everything will be fine.  You'll smooth things over with Leonard and..."

 

"Shirl, please, I don't wanna be alone..."

 

Her best friend turned at the doorstop and peered deeply into Laverne's face.  Abashed, she backed away and averted her eyes.  "Do you feel monophobic again?"

 

"No!" Laverne blurted out.

 

"All right!  I'll see you in two hours - don't wait up!"

 

"Shirl!"  Hell!  Her best friend was gone, leaving Laverne to face up to what she had been avoiding all week.  It had two names: Lenny Kosnowski.

 

What had she done to herself?  Why did she let him do that to her - and why had she enjoyed it so much? 

 

You were drunk.  Don't think about it.

 

She hadn't been drunk when she played with herself yesterday and thought about him, wished he was there touching her instead...

 

Don't tempt yourself...

 

But he would always be there, a temptation.  He had been driving her crazy all week, and then she had touched him at the Pizza Bowl.   A quiet, soft sort of touch....

 

Proof that she wanted him.  Or, wanted to find out why she seemed to want him.

 

She shored herself up against the possibility of heartbreak and walked over to the dumbwaiter, pulling it open and sticking her head inside.  "Lenny!"

 

***

 

He jumped a mile at the sound of her voice.  Flat on the floor, he scooted over to the dumbwaiter and opened it.  "What?" he whined.

 

A pause.  "It's me,  Laverne."

 

"I know."  He rubbed his sore bottom.

 

"Would you mind meeting me on the third floor?"

 

"Why there?"

 

"Cause, Shirley could be home any time, and Squig's up there."

 

"No he ain't..."

 

"Oh, then I'll go up to your place -"

 

"Nah, he's out - but he could come home at any minute, too."

 

"Okay, it's just...I wanna see you alone.  I wanna talk about...you know..."

 

He felt his heart throb violently.  "Yeah.  I'll be there."

 

***

 

She waited for him in the freezing hallway, her navy sweater not enough protection from the wet dampness that seeped in through the worn cracks of the building.  After an impatient five minutes she was ready to give up and leave, but then he appeared at the opposite end of the hall, head down and shoulders stooped.

 

Their eyes met.

 

"Lenny?"

 

"Laverne."

 

***

 

He waited for her to say something, but instead she clicked up the small distance between them, standing before him supplicating.  "Lenny, please," she muttered out loud.

 

"Huh?"

 

She reached up through the miniscule inches between them and kissed his parted lips, her tongue plundering his mouth.  For a second, Lenny battled between desire and anxiety - they would be caught, and he was still worried about his own lackluster earlier performance. 

 

"Make love to me."

 

His features hardened.  "Why, so you can laugh at me when I cry?"

 

"I never laugh when you cry."

 

"Why should I make love to you if you don't love me?"

 

A deep shudder passed through her - then the space between them was closed as she took him into her arms.  "Love me, Lenny.  Please."

 

***

 

What was she saying?  What was she doing? 

 

Her mouth seemed to be moving independently of her brain, revealing things he wasn't supposed to know.  She saw his lips formed a determined line, and suddenly she was flush against the wall, his mouth possessing hers with deep authority.

 

His hands grabbed her breasts, rubbing them roughly through her sweater - there would be time later for gentleness, and this time, she knew, he would take her with all of the violence stored up in his soul.  She thrust out her breasts, head falling back, submitting to his rough caress which became all the less so as he gained control of his wits.

 

"You got beautiful tits, Vernie.  I wish i could see 'em again."  The memory of what her breasts looked like combined with the factuality of what he felt seemed to shove Lenny closer to the edge of his control, and his tongue rasped over her own, causing Laverne to break out in a sweat as he molded his breasts with both palms, her flesh clinging sweetly to his covering hand.  She began yanking at his jacket, pulling at his belt.   Frantically, he broke the kiss.  "God, Vernie!" he called out.  "I've wanted this forever and ever.  Slow down!"

 

She opened her mouth to reply, but instead a sharper, more nasal tone replied.  "Lenny!"

 

***

 

Shit!  Squiggy.

 

Lenny released both of Laverne's breasts and tried to ascertain where the voice was coming from.

 

"Where are you?  Aww, donsh tell me you're gone..." Lenny felt his body relax.   Squiggy, still pickled, called down the dumbwaiter from their fifth-floor apartment.  "You went and saw Godzilla without me!  You clodsh!"

 

Laverne buried a snicker in his shoulder, and he gave her a warning look.  They both stayed very still until a loud "whump!" sounded, following by a snore - apparently, Squiggy had collided with the dumbwaiter and was now fast asleep.

 

Relieved, Lenny turned back to his woman, plying her throat with kisses, her lips with gentle suckling nibbles while his hands once more awkwardly worked her breasts.  Nothing, it seemed, discouraged her joy, and when he felt her hips swiveling beneath the pressure of his Lenny knew she wanted his hand between her thighs.

 

***

 

She wanted his hand between her legs - now.  The palms squashing her breasts had proven themselves surprisingly adept to pleasuring her, no matter how rough and abrupt the caresses.  Her nipples were swollen in the cups of her bra, and she knew he could feel them pressing through the cotton trying to reach his hands.

 

He dropped the right one, tickling her belly through the sweater with his hands before reaching down for the hem of her white skirt, pulling it up and revealing her panty hose and complete lack of panties.

 

That was unintentional - she had been wearing pants all day at work and she had rushed though a quick change back at home.  Blue eyes flashed pure heat as he saw what she had hidden from him, then she gasped when she heard the rending of nylon and then felt the pressure of his two long fingers thrusting to the third knuckle into her wide-open pussy. 

 

Laverne yelped, her body stiffening against the pressure of his body.  The teasing of his mouth and hands had prepared her a little bit, and her already overheated body had produced enough moisture to drown a man, but the suddenness of his entrance shocked her.  The pleasure was pretty close to pain...

 

**

 

"Hurting you?"  He asked, seeing her wince at his abrupt penetration.  She violently shook her head, thrusting her hips against his fingers.  Grinning, he commenced fingering her, driving the pointer and middle from his right hand inside with vigor.

 

She began tossing her head, muttering, her fingers slipping through his hair and pulling him close for a kiss - that required a little twist of his wrist but it was doable, and the meeting of their mouths proved savage this time.  He felt a near-painful throbbing in his cock and groaned into her mouth.  God, he hoped he could last - he didn't want to leave her empty.

 

 

****

 

Empty.  She felt so empty and hungry and sticky and swollen and needy.  "Play with my clit," she whispered against his mouth, and he easily withdrew his fingers and in a single, nearly sophisticated, motion pressed his palm against her clit.

 

She rocked her hips, providing the friction, moving with a complete lack of shame against his outstretched palm.  The heat between them grew and she reached out, pawing at his fly, finding the buttons and pulling them open and reaching through the opening in his boxers to pull out a nice-looking if average-sized cock.  He groaned when she released him to pull out and tease his balls. His eyes rolled, his voice issuing in a deep, long moan.  The spheres resting against her palm began to tighten up in their sac and she released them, taking his shaft into her fist and feeling him drip down her palm, making the friction slick.

 

The fingers delving into her were pumping with a regular but frantic beat - his mouth sucking too hard on her tongue and her breasts sore from his grabbing left hand - but she didn't care.  She wanted him, all of him, right there in the hallway.

 

She pulled her mouth away from his.  "You got a rubber?"

 

***

 

His mind went horrifyingly blank.  Did he have a rubber?  Please God....he kept his fingers in her beautiful snatch but abandoned her breast and reached into his back pocket with his left hand, found his wallet and peered inside.  She reached out with her free hand to help him.  Pictures, coin zip...secret compartment....

 

His Christianity was reborn as he pulled out a tissue-wrapped rubber and showed it to her.

 

Her whole body slumped in relief and she reached out to help him put it on, carefully rolling the rubber down over him with a gentle stroke.  As if to make sure he could wait, she stroked him with her palm one more time before reaching behind her and grabbing onto an electric wall sconce, effectively bracing herself.

 

He pulled his fingers reluctantly free of her pussy, positioning his cock against her softness.  Before he penetrated her, Lenny brought his right hand up to his mouth and sucked away the thick, fragrant juices she'd poured down his fingers.  She watched him do so with a wide-open mouth, a little dazed moan coming from between her lips.  With a smirk, he lunged forward, pushing his cock into her depths and jamming his tongue into her mouth.

 

She yelped again, but the look in her glazed green eyes showed no pain.  His mouth was instantly on hers to soothe away the shock, and then Lenny buried his face against the side of her neck and groaned.  God, how she felt!  He could sense her heat through the rubber, her incredible tightness, and wondered how drunk he had to have been to have gone soft on her a week ago.  He only wished he could feel the wetness he'd just tasted dripping down his cock...

 

***

 

She tasted herself in his mouth, pungent and musky but strangely arousing.  Greedily they swapped tongues, his hips moving jerkily, unevenly, against hers, his thrusts totally controlled by his own ungovernable passion. and desperation.  Was he afraid she would disappear now?

 

And she was already within inches of coming.  Wanting him to slow down, to savor this, Laverne reached down and grabbed his hips with her hands.

 

He went still, wailing into her mouth and shuddering hard, crushing her against the wall as his hips thrust deep, bruising her back his body trembling within and without her.

 

She held still, holding him with her arms.  She couldn't believe it!  He was coming!

 

***

 

He was doing exactly what he had feared he would do - coming too soon inside of her beautiful body.

 

Lenny moaned against her neck as her simple touch brought him easily over the line.  The world disappeared and went dead as he shouted like a wounded animal into her mouth, then felt a total, complete fulfillment overtake his limbs.  As his orgasm receded, he felt a flush of humiliation deeper than what he had experienced a week ago - in his eyes, coming too soon was a way bigger sin that going soft before he could do anything.  He felt Laverne's incredible tightness around his cock, the tension in her sheath, and knew he had failed her at a crucial time. 

 

There was another alternative....

 

He gulped and weighed the negative of tasting the rubber versus leaving Laverne unsatisfied - it was a short and fruitless battle.  She stared at him in uncomprehending surprise as he fell to his knees, pulling out of her sex.

 

"Never say I don't love you," he informed her.

 

Then he pressed his lips to her pussy and gave it a kiss.

 

***

 

Why in the world was he kissing her pussy?  She had never seen a man do that, and while she definitely had to admit she liked the feeling...

 

Didn't she taste bad?

 

With a flush she remembers his enthusiastic slurping on his own fingers and decided to give him what he wanted.  And if she got what she needed in the process, so be it...

 

The tongue lapped.  Lapped and teased through the opening he'd made in her hose.  She cried out softly, muffling the noise with her own lower lip.   The fingers on his right hand probed her creaminess while his left hand reached up and began to manhandle her boobs again.

 

Effortlessly, lovingly, he forced her orgasm to build high, hot, fast.  She writhed against his hands and mouth, then felt his tongue against her clit - low, slow circles then rapid flicks and suck suck suck...

 

When she came - the best thing she had ever felt in her life - she banged her head against the wall, her voice soundless with the beat of her body, the slurping of his mouth as he drank down her juices like fine wine.

 

***

 

She tasted better than beer, Lenny decided, as he watched her orgasm come to a stop.  Even then he stayed there between her thighs, pressing gentle little love kisses to her clit until she stopped shaking and went limp.  When she recovered her muscle structure, he rose to his feet and, under her weary green gaze, licked his lips.

 

Laverne smiled, and then her eyes fell to his lap.  "You're getting come all over your jeans."

 

Lenny looked down and groaned in dismay at the white stains on his pants, caused by his limp cock dripping as it shrank its way out of the condom.  He pulled the rubber off and gingerly shoved his equipment back into the jeans, zipping them up.  She watched him, a tiny smirk on her lips, as he looked around for a place to toss his used rubber. 

 

"There's a garbage chute over there."

 

"You sure it ain't a laundry chute?"

 

"Yeah, Shirl tossed Carmine's best shirt down there when they had a fight last week.  He's still mad it ended up incinerated."

 

Lenny gave Laverne a grateful look before depositing the used lambskin down the chute.  He almost felt like waving goodbye to the rubber, his one and only chance to have a baby with Laverne DeFazio tossed away like so much garbage.

 

He turned around to see her smoothing down her skirt and fixing her hair.  Somehow, she had come away without a visible stain on her - she looked chaste, untouched, except for the vibrancy in her eyes and the scent of her own juices in the air.  Actually, the entire hallway smelled sort of like a cheap whorehouse, Lenny realized with a blush.

 

What could he say to her now?

 

"That was wild," she said at last.

 

He nodded his head.

 

"Len..."  He braced himself for the inevitable 'you're a special guy, but I can't be seen with you in public' speech.  "I wanna do this again."

 

He almost fainted.  "You do?"

 

The joy in his voice made her grin.  "I can't promise you it'll be anything more," she confessed," but yeah.  I wanna do this with you a lot."

 

"I dunno, Laverne - I don't think that wall thingie can take the strain..."

 

She looked up to see the brass structure tilting wildly to the left and blushed, pulling it back into place.  "I don't mean out here in the open," she reached over for him and pressed her mouth to his.  "I mean in a bed.  My bed."

 

He watched her with a stunned, slack jawed look.  He nodded.  "You promise?"

 

She nodded.  "All you got to do is promise to protect me.  It's way too soon for us to even think about babies."

 

He couldn't believe she'd left that door open for him.  He could accept that.  Hell, he'd wear a whole suit of armor if it meant another night like this....

 

Laverne grinned, kissing his cheek.  "Thanks, Len.  You're a great guy."

 

He watched her walk away, rubbing the spot she'd kissed on his cheek.  Suddenly, the world was a beautiful place of magic.  The ugly, drafty building was gorgeous - Squiggy's nonstop yelling at his moths sounded like a chorus of angels.   It was all lovely, for he had a woman now.

 

For the first time in a week, he gave his palm an enthusiastic bite.

The End!