TITLE: Ain’t that Lovin’ Ya Baby
CATEGOREY: Humor/ Shirley and Carmine Romance
SUMMARY: When Laverne and Shirley visit some people that help make a decision of a lifetime.
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This all takes place in California. It was 1:30 P.M. and Laverne and Shirley were sitting on their "deck" drinking tea in lounge chairs listening to the Beach Boys with their new record player. They were talking and watching the people pass by them.
Shirley: Wow, it’s nice out here.
Laverne: Yeah! And we’ll have fun, fun, fu-
Shirley: Laverne please! I think the Beach Boys would prefer it if you let them do the vocal work!
Laverne: Well, well, well! Hey look! There’s Carmine. Hey Carmine!
Laverne waved to him and he waved back then said he was on his way up. He walked through the door and over to the girls. He was behind Shirley and gave her a kiss on the check than sat at the end of her chair.
Laverne: What’s up Carmine? Why are you here? Carmine: Oh, well excuse me! Can’t a guy see his two favorite people in the world?
They laughed.
Shirley: So, are we all gonna do something tonight? I heard that there was going to be a band playing at that new country bar.
Laverne: Hey that sounds fun! You wanna go Carmine? We can invite everyone else too!
Carmine: Oh, well uh, I can’t make it.
Shirley: Why sweetie, what’s wrong?
Carmine: Well, I have ta go somewhere.
Shirley: WHAT?!
Carmine: Calm down Shirl! It will only be for a few days!
Shirley: Where are you going?
Carmine: Well, I’m going to see my parents in Alabama.
Shirley: ALABAMA!
Carmine: Shirl calm down! I’ll be back soon!
Shirley: Alabama? That’s all the way on the other side of the country!
Laverne: I think I better leave you two alone now!
Shirley: No Laverne stay!
Carmine: Look Shirl, I’ll only be gone for a few short days and then I’ll be back! It’s their anniversary and they were gonna have a little party.
Shirley: But wait, I thought your parents lived in New York.
Carmine: Yeah well they wanted to live some place where it was a little homier ya know?
Shirley: Oh. Carmine… Laverne I think you better leave now!
She left.
Carmine: No Shirl! You’re not gonna do that! I have ta go! You can’t stop me!
She sighed. Carmine: Hey I know!
Shirley: What?
Carmine: Why don’t you go with me? You and Laverne! You two would have a ball it would be great! And we have enough rooms! Come one Shirl!
Shirley: Oh, I don’t know. Mr. Hilibrand might not like that.
Carmine: You’re gonna let your boss ruin a good time? Come on Shirl! Come with me! It’ll be fun! I’m leaving tomorrow at 2:30 P.M.
Shirley: …well… I guess it would be good to get out… but I have a job…well…ok!
Carmine: Good! I gotta go! I’ll call you later!
Right when he ran out the door Laverne was waiting on the couch for Shirley. She walked in and headed up stairs.
Laverne: Hey, where ya going?
Shirley: Come on Laverne! We’re going to Alabama!
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It was now 5:00 in the afternoon and Laverne and Shirley were introduced to Carmine’s parents for the fortieth time. Then they followed Carmine up stairs to get situated in their rooms. While they were walking up the stairs, his mom stopped him.
Mrs. Ragusa: Oh Carmine dear, the extra room is being painted, so you won’t get to use that one. Maybe two of you could share a room!
She looked at Carmine and Shirley and they continued up the stairs. They walked down the hall to the rooms. The hallway was kinda small so they were cramped. The rooms were both across from each other.
Laverne: Oh good! I’ll get this room and you and Carmine can share that one!
Shirley: What?! Um, Laverne-
Laverne: Oh come on Shirl! Live a little!
Laverne walked into the room and shut the door. Shirley looked at Carmine and they walked into their room. It had one bed but it was a king size.
Carmine: Well uh, make yourself at home Angelface!
Shirley: Yeah… ok.
She sat her stuff down and so did Carmine. The door was shut and they both sat down at either sides of the bed. They sat back to back for a minute and then turned to each other and started to make-out. They were than interrupted by Carmine’s parents and his aunt and uncle. They all stood at the door and Carmine and Shirley slowly sat up again.
Carmine: Um, Aunt Willa, Uncle Tony, this is my girlfriend, Shirley Feeney.
They shook hands.
Aunt Willa: Nice to meet you.
Shirley: Oh it’s my pleasure!
She smiled than turned around and made a terrified face of embarrassment.
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It was now 7:00 P.M. and everyone was dressed up in their country clothes sitting on the deck and the children were running around. There was music and some people were dancing. There was a lake right on the side of the house were you could see it from the front and there was bridge over it. Laverne and Shirley sat there in their clothes that they would wear to work with their black high heels. They felt a little out of place because the other women were wearing bright dresses with flowers on them and no shoes at all while the guys wore military uniforms or pants, a shirt and a scruffy blazer.
Laverne got up and was dancing with a military man she met and Shirley was sitting with Carmine talking to his relatives. He had his arm around her and they all talked together.
Mrs. Ragusa: So Shirley, I’ve heard so much about you. You’ve changed since I saw you last.
Shirley: Oh, is that so? Haha!
Mrs. Ragusa: How long has it been? I mean, how long have you two actually been going out?
Shirley: Oh, well it been kind of on and off.
Carmine: See, we have an agreement that we can date other people, but we are still together.
Shirley: Yes, but we’ve been together since high school!
Mrs. Ragusa: Hmm, really? And neither of you thought it was about time?
Carmine: About time for what?
He saw his mother’s look.
Carmine: Oh, look ma, can we not get into this now?
Mrs. Ragusa got up and left the group. Carmine got up and walked off after her, leaving Shirley sitting behind to face the rest of his family.
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Mrs. Ragusa and Carmine were both in the kitchen.
Carmine: Look ma, I know you want me to get married, but right now… it’s not he right time.
Mrs. Ragusa: I know, I know! It’s never the right time! When will you stop telling me that?
Carmine: Well, I just don’t know…
Mrs. Ragusa: Know what? Look, I know I always tell you you should get married, but I think that that Feeney girl is good for you! She’s sweet, and the whole family likes her. And you seem to like her too! She seems to like you! Besides, she needs a new last name anyway!
They smiled.
Carmine: I just don’t know how she feels. I guess since we’ve been together so long, it would be practical. But…
Mrs. Ragusa: Don’t you worry baby boy! Don’t you worry.
She walked out and he smiled and looked at the ground. Then he realized what she said and ran after her.
Carmine: MOM! MOM! Great, now what is she gonna do.
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Mrs. Ragusa: Shirley darling! Come with me my dear!
Shirley got up and walked away with Mrs. Ragusa.
Mrs. Ragusa: Shirley, let’s go out shall we?
Shirley: Oh well I don’t know, I mean-
Mrs. Ragusa: Come dear. We need to talk.
They got in the car drove off. They soon arrived at a bar and Shirley was served many drinks. She was served so many that she was could hardly sit up. She laughed at almost anything anyone said.
Mrs. Ragusa: So, Shirley, what do you think of Carmine? I mean, you two seem like quiet and item!
Shirley: Oh, Carmine… Carmine…
She laid her head down on her arm.
Shirley: He’s just wonderful! Haha! I don’t know what I’d do without him! He’s… he’s… everything I’ve ever wanted! He’s… oh no!
She got and ran to the bathroom.
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It was now 11:45 that night and Shirley’s eyes opened. She was laying on the couch and Laverne, Carmine, and Mr. Ragusa were all sitting by her.
Carmine: Shirl! You’re up! Shirley: Huh? Oh, hey everyone! What… what happened?
Laverne: Oh well, Mrs. Ragusa here took ya out and got ya drunk! It was pretty funny to me! She’s got guts ya know!
She started laughing and Carmine gave her a look.
Laverne: It really wasn’t that funny though.
Shirley: Oh yeah! I remember now!
Carmine: Um everyone, I think we need to be alone right now.
Everyone got up and left. The song, "Ain’t That Loving You Baby," by Jimmy Reed came on.
Carmine: Hey, I’m sorry about my mom!
Shirley: It’s ok, I knew what she doing.
Carmine: Then why didn’t you say something.
Shirley: Oh, I figured I’d let her have her fun and think she was up to no good.
Carmine: Well, for that you ended up in a pretty good possession!
They laughed.
Carmine: Look, I know this is kinda obvious now, but, well… you know how I feel about you, and you know I would do anything for you. I mean, I’d die for you! And you know that! I really think that whatever I say, you’ll already know, so I’ll cut it short. There are so many things that could describe my love for you and how I feel about you. And I hope you feel the same way I do. So, will you marry me?
Shirley: Oh Carmine!
Carmine: Is that a yes?
Shirley: Yes!
They heard clapping and cheering from the other room. They looked at each other and kissed. Carmine slipped a diamond ring on her finger and Shirley almost fainted again.
Carmine: Well, ain’t that lovin’ ya baby.
They smiled and kissed more.
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It was the night after and everyone was sitting around like the night before. It seemed like there was a party everyday. It was eight o’clock and everyone was having fun. They all heard the news about Shirley and Carmine.
Mrs. Ragusa: Well it is about time you two! I mean, it seems as though one of you could have figured it out! Hell, I had to take Shirley out here and get her drunk just to find out if-
Shirley: Well, maybe if you would have just would have asked it would have been better because I have a really bad headache!
Shirley smiled than got up and walked away from everyone.
Carmine: Great mom! Thanks! It was a really good idea you had doing that! Mrs. Ragusa: Well I just wanted to know-
Carmine: You just need to mind your own business! How about that?
He got up and left towards the direction Shirley went. She was in the living room sitting on the couch. He sat next to her.
Carmine: Shirl, I’m really sorry about my mom. She just has a big nose.
Shirley: Yeah well I’m sorry for walking away. I know she’s your mom and all and I probably made a scene in front of everyone, but I’m so sick of her always getting in our business. No offence.
Carmine: No, no, I know what you’re saying. Don’t worry about it. Hey I have an idea.
Shirley: What?
Carmine: Maybe if we act really close and touchy around her she’ll mind her own business. Ya know, show her something that would scare her off.
Shirley: Like what? You don’t mean-
Carmine: No, not that close! I mean, like act we’re the only two people in the world and be nasty and stuff.
Shirley: Oh, come on Carmine. Give me a break.
Carmine: No I mean it!
Shirley: Well… ok!
Shirley and Carmine walked out together and sat back down.
Shirley: Sorry Mrs. Ragusa! I was just…
Carmine: It’s ok hunny, you don’t need to explain anything!
Shirley: Oh, well I really didn’t mean to be rude!
Carmine: It’s ok… really!
They started to kiss and soon Shirley was on top of Carmine in the chair they were sitting in and they were making out.
Everyone was looking at them and soon they all left. Laverne sat there laughing her head off.
Laverne: Hey guys, haha, they’re gone now! Guys…hey gu-… Shirl… Carmine…
She hit Shirley on her back and then they stopped. They both looked at her.
Laverne: Haha! That was good you guys!
Carmine: You think is scared her off?
Laverne: I would say so!
Carmine: Hey, let’s go inside Shirl…
They got up and walked inside, Shirley looked behind her should at Laverne and smiled and Laverne gave her a thumbs up.
The End
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