Was It *Really* Desperation? Re: [LSFanFiction] *CHALLENGE* *ALL* Alternate Ending for "Dog Day's Blind Date/LBYL" Challenge!

NOTE: This is a none-smut challenge, but it has im plicated adult themes.

While I'm challenging *grins wickedly*....you know how in "Dog Day Blind Dates"...when Laverne suggests to Shirley that they Vo-Deo-Do with Squiggy and Lenny because they're minutes away from oblivion? Shirley talks her out of it...but what if she wasn't sucessful? What if Laverne had gone ahead and "done" it with one of the boys in those brief moments before the robbers are arrested, and then has to live with the consequences?

Note that, a few months later in LBYL, she fears that she's pregnant. Wouldn't it add resonance to Lenny's proposal if he fears he's the father of her baby?

No, I'm not asking for smut here, but I think some good, solid dramatics could take place. I'm thinking more an angst/drama piece. It's sort of an L/L challenge, but if you can manage to turn this into Squiggy/Laverne I'll be immensely intrigued.

STIP:
1): Only ONE of the boys, please! Not even Laverne would be desperate enough to...you know...with both of them! Just get one of the guys out of the bathroom (I can personally picture Laverne pitching one of them out on their ear to be alone with the other -well, more Lenny than Squiggy-)



Note: Remember Missy: you asked for it! LoL!

Note #2: This picks up after the boys are already in the ladies' room & the girls have been told that one of them will be "tossed out" first.

Note #3: I haven't seen this eppy in a while, so pardon my quotes from the eppy if they aren't exact. Thanx! *grin*

* * * * *

Was It *Really* Desperation?

      "...Atleast once in our lives we should've vodey-o-doe-doed," Laverne says.
      "With those two?! I wouldn't give them the satisfaction!" Shirley says, defiantly.
      "No, not them, Lenny and Squiggy," Laverne says.
      Shirley gives her a disgusted look. "Laverne, I don't want to go through life linked with Lenny and Squiggy. If it had to be anyone, it would be Carmine Ragusa. He's waited so patiently..." Shirley pauses, with a dreamy look on her face.
      Laverne tries to get Shirley out of her dream, but it doesn't work. She pauses a moment and, slowly,a grin appears on her face. She walks over to the ladies' room and goes in.
      Seconds later, the door flies open and Squiggy comes barreling out... and right smack into Shirley.
      Shirley comes out of her daydream and looks at Squiggy, who grins at her. She screams. "What're you doing out here!?"
      "Laverne t'rew me out. I dunno, she wanted Lenny for som'en," Squiggy says.
      Shirley grabs the lapels of his jacket. "Did she say anything?!"
      "She said, 'Lenny!' and t'rew me out the door!" Squiggy replies, looking confused.
      "Oh no... No, no, no..." Shirley mutters.
      "Hey, Shirl, didn't Chuck say he was gonna kill one-a you girls first? Wit' Laverne in there, ain't he gonna kill you first?" Squiggy points out.
      Shirley looks shocked, but perks up. She snaps her fingers. "I've got an idea." Charles comes back in. "Oh, Charles?"
      "Yes, Shirley?" Charles answers and walks over. As he gets closer, Shirley pushes Squiggy into him, ramming his head into Charles's gut. Charles drops his gun, and Shirley picks it up, gingerly.
      Finally, the police get the door open and come in. One of them snaps the cuffs on Charles, while another points at Squiggy. "Man, this is one scuzzy lookin' robber."
      "He's just scuzzy. The other robber is in the alleys," Shirley says, handing over the gun to the first cop. She brushes off her hands and turns in time to see the ladies' room door open. Laverne comes out, completely disheveled, followed by Lenny, who's just as equally disheveled, but has a goofy grin on his face. Shirley screams... again.


      "Are you crazy?!" Shirley yells.
      "Shirl!" Laverne says.
      Shirley is now nearly hyperventalating. "What about the chug-a-lug contest and the shorts?"
      "I asked one of the fellas and they did say I won and that's how I got the shorts," Laverne says. "But, remember when I went out with Charles and he blew up Pop's bathroom?"
      Shirley pauses and takes a deep breath... then screams again.
      "Shirl, ya gotta stop doin' that," Laverne says, checking her ears.
      "But, Vernie, what if you really are pregnant? What if it's..." Shirley trails off. "We're going to that appointment right now!" She drags Laverne out of the apartment.


      The girls come back into their apartment. Shirley is holding her head. "I don't believe it."
      "Shirl, you've been saying that the entire way home," Laverne says.
      Their door flies open, and the boys come in. "So, what's the verdict?" Squiggy asks, receiving a shove from Lenny.
      Shirley points at Laverne. "She... she..."
      "I'm pregnant," Laverne answers.


      "...I'll make a pepperoni outta 'im!" Frank says.
      Laverne stops him. "Pop! Lemme explain!"
      "I'll give you two minutes before I hunt 'im down," Frank says.
      "Pop," Laverne says. "I'm gettin' married, too."
      "You... him... When did all this happen!?" he yells.
      "Len's always had atleast a little crush on me. I sorta helped it along when your bathroom got blown up, and I was afraid I was gonna die," Laverne explains.
      "I gotta sit down," Frank says, then sits.


      Shirley is sitting on the couch, holding her head. Lenny is sitting next to her.
      "Awe, Shirl, you're overractin'," Lenny says.
      She turns and glares at him. "Am I?"
      "Laverne was the one who came in there and threw out Squig!" he argues.
      "But you didn't do anything!" Shirley argues.
      "I wouldn't say *that*," Lenny says.
      "Ugh! I don't wanna hear it!" Shirley exclaims.
      The door opens and Laverne comes in, dragging Frank along with her.
      "You don't wanna hear what, Shirl?" Laverne asks.
      "Nothing!" Shirley says, offering a nervous smile.
      "Oh," Laverne says. "Anyway, Pop, Len asked me ta marry 'im an' I'd like to have your consent."
      Frank looks at Lenny--who looks like a deer caught in headlights, while trying to smile--and turns back to Laverne. "Muffin, as long as you're happy, anything."
      "Awe, thanks, Pop!" Laverne says, hugging Frank. She lets go, then hugs Lenny.
      Meanwhile, Shirley dabs at her eyes. "This was so beautiful!"


~The End~












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