ONE
It's noontime and all of the bottlecappers are having lunch in the breakroom.

"Laverne, what's this?" Shirley asked, unfolding a piece of paper that was in her lunch box.

"I don't know. Read it and tell me what it says," Laverne told her, with a mouthful of food.

"Must you...Laverne! It's two tickets to see the Green Bay Packers!"

"THE PACKERS?!" Laverne screamed. Shirley shushed her. "The Packers?"

"It says that we'll meet our escorts on the train, tomorrow, at one o'clock in the afternoon...Escorts?" Shirley flipped the paper over trying to find more information on their 'escorts'.

Laverne thought for a moment, then smiled, "I'll bt it's two gorgeous guys with a lot of money in their pockets and this is the only way they knew to get our attentions."

"But why us?" Shirley shook her head, "We don't even know if we know these guys. They..."

"Shirl," Laverne covered Shirley's mouth with her hand, "stop it. I mean, who cares, these guys obviously like us. There can't be too much wrong with them."

TWO
Later that afternoon

The girls are running around their apartment trying to get ready for their trip.

"Shirl, I can't find my suitcase!" Laverne began twirling around, looking for it.

Shirley pointed it out, "It's right there in front of you... ew, Laverne, what is this rotten looking thing in my suitcase?"

Suddenly, the door flies open and Lenny and Squiggy walk in, startling the girls.

"Hello!" Squiggy said, leaning against the doorway. "What ya doin'?"

"Boys, get out of here, we're trying to get ready for trip," Shirley said, trying to push them out the door.

"What trip? Where're you two goin'?" Lenny asked.

"We might as well tell 'em, Shirl, there's no harm," Laverne told her, then disappeared into the bedroom.

"Heh... well, we're going on a train, to Green Bay, to see the packers," Shirley explained moving towards the couch, shortly followed by Squiggy, with Lenny right behind him.

"The Packers huh...HA! Where'd you two get the money for this trip?" Squiggy asked, paused, then turned to Lenny. "Do you know, Len?"

"Naw, I don't know nothin'," Lenny answered.

"You never know nothin'," Squiggy mumbled. "Why didn't you tell us. After all, we mighta wanted to say 'Goodbye'." He and Lenny both puckered up.

Shirley choked back a laugh, "That was our reason for not telling you."

Squiggy turned and looked at Lenny. The two started for the door.

"What'd she mean by that?" Squiggy asked.

"She doesn't know either," Lenny answered, slamming the door behind him.

"You can come out now, Vernie, they're gone," Shirley made a look of disgust, "Gee, thanks for leaving me alone!"

"Shirl, I made progress...I'm packed and ready to go," Laverne set the suitcase on the floor.

"So fast?" Shirley asked, darting for the suitcase. "Let's just see what you've chosen to bring." She opened the suitcase, "Laverne!" She holds up the empty suitcase, "you better be joking!"

Laverne looked at her, then shrugged her shoulders, "I just wanted to see your reaction."

"Well, you saw it. Can we get serious now?" Shirley asked, annoyed.

"Oh, all right," Laverne trudgingly agreed.

THREE
The next day at the train station, it's packed

"Laverne, the train's this way!" Shirley yelled over the crowd of people, grabbing her arm. "We've gotta hurry, it leaves in ten minutes!"

"I'm comin', I'm comin'," Laverne said, struggling with her suitcase. "I think I'm bringing too much with me."

"It's only too much compared to your little prank yesterday...Here's our train," Shirley told her.

The two girls get on the train, only to find that it's packed with other Packers fans.

"Where're our seats?" Laverne panted.

"Seats 7A and 8A," Shirley said, looking for the seat numbers. "Vernie, I don't think we're sitting together."

"Of course we ain't, we're sittin' with our "escorts"!" Laverne explained, winking at her. "Our seats are over there."

The two girls moved closer. Their "escorts" were already seated. "Hi, fellas!" Laverne yelled, then waved until she saw who their "escorts" were.

Lenny and Squiggy turned around to greet the girls.

"No, no, no..." Shirley tried to shake it off.

"Hi, neighbor!" Squiggy exclaimed and grabbed Shirley's arm and sat her down next to him.

"I guess that leaves you for me," Lenny said, reaching for Laverne.

"Nevermind, I'll sit on my own," Laverne said, sitting down. "Is this some kind of sick joke?"

"Oh, Laverne, you silly duck," Squiggy laughed. "Lenny, you explain this 'sick joke'."

"Well, we won the truck drivers' pool... three hundred bucks to be exact and we thought that maybe you'd like to share some of our good luck," Lenny explained, giggled, and bit his palm.

"Don't do that," Laverne made a look of disgust.

"Did you two pay for this whole trip or are we gonna have to pay our own way home?" Shirley asked, skeptically.

"Paid in full..." Lenny started.

"This is our treat to you," Squiggy finished.

Shirley motioned for Laverne to lean across the aisle. "I've got a bad feeling about this. They're doing this for us, which means that WE'LL have to do something for them!"

Laverne made a face, "Yuck!"

Lenny leaned over and joined their conversation, "And we collect at any time..."

Laverne elbowed him. "I don't wanna hear this!"

"Laverne, just sit back and calm down. It'll be over soon," Shirley consolled.

"Then we collect," Squiggy added.

Shirley elbowed him. "What have we gotten into?" she asked herself.

FOUR
Later that afternoon

Squiggy fell asleep leaning against the window, Shirley was napping with her feet on his gut, and Laverne was trying to forget that she was sitting next to Lenny, who was staring out the window.

Laverne looked over at Shirley, shook her head, and turned to Lenny, "What's so interesting out there?"

"Shh...I'm trying to take in the sights," Lenny said.

Laverne sat for a minute, thinking. "Len, you're not ignoring me because of what I said earlier?" No answer. "Len?...Len?" She hit him on the shoulder.

"Oww... what're ya hittin' me for?" Lenny whined.

"Don't whine..." Laverne started.

"I wasn't whining!" Lenny whined, more so than before.

"Anyway, what exactly are the plans for this trip?" Laverne asked, nearly giving up.

"It's'posed to be a surprise, but... I'll tell ya," Lenny leaned forward and looked at Squiggy, to make sure he was still asleep. "Here's the highlights: we see the games, eat, and sleep."

"Games? As in more than one?" Laverne asked.

"Yup."

"Eat?"

"Yeah, dinner, breakfast, lunch."

"Sleep?... Breakfast?!"

Lenny giggled. "Surprise!"

"I don't wanna know anymore."

"Okay." Lenny turned back to the window.

Laverne slumped down in her seat, very unhappy.

FIVE
Later, at the train station

"Oh, Laverne, it's so beautiful here!" Shirley exclaimed.

Laverne looked aroud, "Shirl, it's a train station, not Paris, Rome, or even some little dump in the middle of nowhere..."

"Oh, wow... this place looks exactly the same as the station we left from," Lenny said

"Of course it does. Otherwise people'd get confused and think that they boarded a train and exited a airplane," Squiggy said, dropping his bag on the ground.

"Okay, boys, where're we goin' to next?" Laverne asked.

Squiggy moved next to Shirley and smiled, "Well, check-in at the hotel has to be done by five o'clock."

Lenny giggled.

"Check-in at the hotel?!" Shirley yelled.

"Where'd ya espect us to stay? At the stadium? Geez," Squiggy said, annoyed.

The four gather up their bags. They go out to the front of the train station to flag down a taxi.

SIX
The boys walk into the hotel's lobby.

"Squig, I think this place's too classy..." Lenny said, looking around.

"So what? They don't care as long as we have money," Squiggy told him.

"Hey, fellas, little help here," Laverne said, loudly.

Lenny turned around and waved, "We're over here!"

Laverne and Shirley enter carrying all the bags.

Shirley dropped her bags, "Thank you for being such gentlemen." She gave them an angry look.

"No problem," Squiggy said, turning to the front desk.

SEVEN
Laverne unlocked the door and stepped into the hotel room, closely followed by Shirley.

"Oh, my..." Shirley gasped.

"We've hit the mother-load..." Laverne said, dropping her bags. "I just hope that this place doesn't have little furry creatures running around!"

Shirley was about to say something, but was interrupted.

The boys came in.

"Wha'd'ya think?" Squiggy asking, plopping onto one of the beds.

"I think I'm gonna be sick..." Shirley mumbled. She covered her mouth and ran for the bathroom.

"Shirl!?" Laverne called after her. No answer. She looked at the bed by the window, "Me and Shirl call the one by the window!" She darted towards the bed, dove onto it, and sat up, only to see Lenny coming towards her. "No way!"

Lenny sat down next to her, "What's your problem? I gotta sit somewhere." He motioned around. "No chairs."

"Sorry," Laverne said, standing up. "Shirl, you okay?"

The bathroom door opened and Shirley stepped out, "I'm fine...why aren't there any chairs in this room?"

"Maybe they don't espect the people stayin here to do much sittin', but a lot of loungin'," Squiggy said, grinning.

Shirley picked up a pillow, "Uh!" She whacked him in the head with it, repeatedly.

"Hey, Shirl, he was just jokin'!" Lenny said, getting up. He went over and grabbed the pillow.

Laverne motioned for Shirley to come over to her, "Don't waste your energy... we may have to beat them senseless with the pillows later." She thought for a moment, "Sorry, they're already senseless!"

"Thank you," Squiggy said, rubbing his head.

EIGHT
Later that night

Shirley is still at the hotel, while Laverne and the boys are at the football game.

"Ooooh..." Shirley moaned, sitting on the side of the bathtub.

There's a knock at the door.

"I'll... be there... in a minute," Shirley got up and took her time going to the door. She put a hand on the doorknob and said, "Who is it?"

"Telegram."

"Huh?" Shirley opened the door to find Carmine standing there, smiling. His smile faded.

"Are you alright?" Carmine asked, closing the door behind him. "You don't look so good, Angel Face."

Shirley forced a smile, "I'm just a little sick." She thought for a moment, "How did you know I was here?"

"Well, I 'convinced' Lenny and Squiggy to tell me why they had bought four train tickets and basically just why they had three hundred dollars. When they got to the hotel part I stopped them and decided that I had better come," Carmine paused for a moment. "Is Laverne with them at the football game?"

"Yes, I was gonna go, but I felt a little...ill," Shirley said.

Carmine thought for a moment, "Do you want me to take you home?"

Shirley perked up, "Would you?"

"Sure."

"Just let me leave a note for Laverne," Shirley grabbed a piece of paper and a pen and scribbled a quick message. "Let's go."

NINE
"I won!" Laverne yelled, reaching the hotel room first, shortly followed by Lenny.

"No fair! You tripped Squiggy back there and I almost tripped over him," Lenny said, pointing down the hall.

"Can I help it if I know how to cheat?!" Laverne said, knocking on the door. No answer. "Maybe Shirl went to bed..."

Lenny bit his palm.

"Do you have to do that?" Laverne asked, digging out her room key.

Lenny stared at her for a moment. "Yes."

Laverne opened the door and stepped in. She didn't see Shirley. "Shirl?" She paused, "Anyone?"

"Hello?" Squiggy answered, staggering into the room. "You tripped me!" he accused.

"Yes, I did," Laverne said. She knocked on the bathroom door, "Shirl?... Where is she?"

Lenny picked up a piece of paper, "She left with Carmine."

Laverne spun around, "What'd you say?"

"Here, read for yourself," Lenny said, handing her the note.

Laverne read the note silently. "Carmine took her home..." She trailed off.

"Looks like it's just the three of us," Squiggy pointed out.

"Uh..." Laverne staggered. "I call first for the bathroom!" She grabbed her bag, ran into the bathroom, and slammed the door.

"She wants us," Squiggy said, feeling proud of himself.

Lenny giggled.

TEN
Laverne opened the bathroom door and she found the boys watching "Heckle & Jeckle". She tiptoed up to the first bed, climbed over it, and went to the second bed, the one closer to the window. A commercial came on and the boys came out of their zombie-like state.

"That's the best show on TV," Lenny said

"Actually, I like that test-pattern thing best," Squiggy said, standing up. "FREE BATHROOM!" he yelled, running in and slamming the door behind him.

Laverne rolled over to face the window.

Lenny came up behind her. "Laverne?" he whispered. No answer. "Laverne?" he said a little louder. Still no answer. Lenny leaned over, about three inches above her ear, "LAVERNE, YOU ASLEEP!?" he asked, very loudly.

Laverne turned her head to face him, "I was trying to sleep, thank you, Len," she answered sarcastically.

"You're welcome," Lenny said, smiling.

Laverne groaned, "Do you mind if I go to sleep?"

"Why would I mind?" Lenny turned to the other bed, picked up a pillow, and turned back to Laverne, "Ain't ya gonna join in the pillow fight?" He hit her with the pillow.

Laverne sat up. "You want me to join in the pillow fight? All right." She stood up, picked up a pillow, and swung it at him, hitting his arm. "I'll join in." She swung again.

Lenny ducked and Laverne hit the lamp on the night stand, knocking it to the floor.

"Why were ya aimin' for the lamp? It didn't do nothin' to ya," Lenny said, picking up the lamp. "It's senseless violence like this that..."

Laverne hit him again with the pillow. Lenny looked at her, put the broken lamp on the bed, and swung his pillow, starting a full-blown pillow fight.

On To Part 2

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