ONE
softball field, Saturday afternoon

It's girls (Laverne, Lauren, and Kristin - Shirley's cheerleading) against guys (Lenny, Squiggy, and Carmine).

Laverne is pitching to Squiggy.

Squiggy (getting irritated)- C'mon, Laverne, just throw the dumb ball!

Laverne (winding up)- Okay!

Laverne throws the ball and Squiggy strikes out with a whiff that nearly corkscrews him into the ground. He goes over to the bench. Lenny gets up and takes Squiggy's bat.

Carmine- Knock it outta the park, Len!

Lenny (at home plate; yelling towards the outfield)- Lauren! Ya gotta go farther out than that! (he giggles)

Lauren sticks her tongue out at him, but he doesn't see it.

Laverne pitches and Lenny hits it on the first swing (he spun around 360 degrees, he swung so hard).

The ball sails into the outfield, towards Lauren. She looks up and starts running out farther, watching the ball. She gets to what would be the warning track and goes for a basket catch, but runs into the wall head first and falls on her back.

Everyone else, in the infield, just stands there waiting for her to get up.

Laverne (starts running out)- C'mon! She ain't gettin' up!

All six of them run out to check on Lauren, who starts to wake up as they get to her. Lenn and Squiggy help her sit up.

Lauren (rubbing her head)- Wow, whatta headache!

Lenny- I said ya weren't standin' deep enough... (Laverne slaps him in the back of his head)

Kristin- Boy, did you take a header into the wall.

Lauren- I did?

Shirley- You were running after the softball and you ran into the wall. (she points at the wall, about six feet away)

Lauren- Oh... yeah.

Laverne- You okay?

Lauren- I just gotta headache.

Carmine- I think we oughtta take 'er home.

Shirley- Good idea.

The boys help Lauren up and Lenny lets her lean on him for the short walk home. {Awwe!... I know, I know}

TWO
Lauren & Kristin's apartment, an hour later

Lauren is laying on the couch, with an ice pack {that ould choke a polar bear} on her head.

Kristin- Want 'ny aspirin?

Lauren- Please. (she takes the ice pack off her head and sits up)

Kristin (comes over to the couch and sits)- Here. (she gives her the aspirin and a glass of water)

Lauren (taking the glass)- Thanks. (she takes the aspirin)

Kristin (lookig at her forehead)- You've got one whopper of a bruise there! You outta yell at Lenny for making ya run into the wall.

Lauren- Huh? (she looks at Kristin) Who's Lenny?

THREE
Laverne & Shirley's apartment

Kristin comes charging in.

Kristin (out of breath)- Lauren... remember... I need... some water...

Shirley gets a glass of water and gives it to Kristin. She gulps it down.

Laverne- What're ya tryin' to say?

Kristin- Lauren doesn't remember what happened! She asked me who Lenny was!

Shirley- Oh no!

Laverne- She don't think she's Roxy Lateur, does she?

Shirley glares at Laverne, who doesn't see it.

Kristin- No, she doesn't know who she is! I tried asking her a coupla things and everytime I mentioned someone's name, she asked who they were!

Shirley- We gotta help her!

They leave the apartment.

FOUR
Lauren & Kristin's apartment

Lauren is still sitting on the couch, holding the ice pack on her head.

The door opens slowly.

Lenny (coming in, somewhat slowly)- Hi. Ya feelin' any better?

Lauren (looks at him)- Not really.

Lenny (goes over to the end of the couch)- Can I sit?

Lauren- Sure.

Lenny (sitting)- I'm sorry about makin' ya chase the ball into the wall.

Lauren stays silent. She puts her head back against the couch.

Lenny- Lauren?

She doesn't look at him.

The girls come in the already open door.

Lenny gets up and goes over to them.

Lenny- I think she's mad at me...

Kristin- No, she's not mad, just confused.

Shirley- We think she's got amnesia...

Laverne- ...Luckily she don't think she's Roxy... (Shirley clamps her hand over Laverne's mouth)

Lenny- We gotta snap her outta it.

Shirley- How?

Kristin- We have to remind her of certain things...

Laverne- That ain't gonna work. If she was gonna be reminded by anything... or anyone... it shoulda been Lenny, but she ain't any better!

Kristin- Aren't there any other ways?

Shirley- We can wait and let it pass on its own, by giving her constant, little reminders.

Kristin- I'll start, then, how about I send her down to you, then you can help?

Laverne & Shirley- Okay.

They leave.

Kristin- You wanna help me, Len?

Lenny- Naw, she don't even know I'm talkin' to her (he leaves)

{Audience "awwe's"... sorry, I had to!}

Kristin (sits next to Lauren)- How'd'ya like to look at some pictures?

Lauren (looks at Kristin)- Me?

Kristin- Yeah.

Lauren (shrugs her shoulders)- Sure, why not.

Kristin gets up and goes into the bedroom. She comes out a minute later, carrying about 15 pounds worth of pictures. She sits down and starts showing them to Lauren. She doesn't remember any of them.

FIVE
Laverne & Shirley's apartment

Laverne and Shirley also tried pictures... it still didn't work.

Shirley- Are you sure you don't remember what happened?

Lauren (getting irritated)- What're you talkin' about?

Laverne- She's talkin' about when ya ran into the wall!... We're tryin' to get ya to remember stuff!

Lauren- I remember.

Shirley- Who are you?

Lauren- Uh...

Laverne- Ya don't remember!...

Lauren (stands up)- I ain't gonna stay here and let you keep yellin' at me! (she leaves quickly)

Shirley- Laverne, she doesn't know where she's going.

Laverne- Maybe.

SIX
fourth floor

Lauren comes up the stairs and stops at the top. She looks at the door to her left, then the door to the right. She goes over to the boys' apartment and knocks on the door.

The door opens.

Lenny- Whassa matter?

Lauren- I'm confused! (she goes in and sits at the table)

Lenny (closes the door)- Why don'tcha go and let the girls help ya...

Lauren- No, I was down there for an hour and I ended up gettin' yelled at... I really wanna remember everything again!

Lenny- Well, that's the first part, you know ya don't remember.

Lauren- yeah, but it doesn't help me remember! All it does is irritate me.

Lenny- I can tell. (he sits next to her) Whadya want me to do about it?

Lauren- Something... but not pictures. I've seen enough to last a life time.

The door flies open.

Squiggy (coming in)- hello! (he slams the door behind him)

Lauren (glaring at Squiggy)- Why don't you ever knock!?

Lenny glares at Lauren.

Lauren (realizing)- On, my gosh! Squig, for once your rotten manners actually camein good use! (she glances over at a mirror and sees the bruise on her forehead) Oh, thanks alot, Len. Lookit this thing. (she gets up and goes over to the mirror) Why the heck did I hafta run into the wall?

Squiggy- Because the softball didn't hitcha in the head.

Lauren- Thanks for the explanation, Squig.

Lenny- Ya shoulda let the ball hit off the wall...

Lauren- I can't get the ball when it hits off the wall. i never know where it's gonna go!

Squiggy- What gotcha to remember?

Lenny- Shush!

Lauren- huh? Remember what?

Squiggy- She's goin' again!...

Lenny (clamps his hand over Squiggy's mouth)- Shut up.

Lauren- Wait, what's he talkin' about?

Lenny (still with his hand over Squiggy's mouth)- Well, ya sorta couldn't remember anythin' after ya ran into the wall.

Squiggy nods.

Lauren- Amnesia?... Wonderful, another new experience. (she rolls her eyes)

Squiggy (getting Lenny's hand off his mouth)- It's a good thing I came in when I did!

THE END :)~










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