Displaced
Part 4
By Lauren The Lone Wolfette
(L&S/PS/HD)
* * * * *
In Laverne and Shirley's room, Laverne is sitting on the edge of one
bed, looking over the remote control.
A knock to the tune of 'shave and a hair cut' sounded at the door.
Laverne tossed the remote on the bed and went over to the door. "Shirl,
ya nearly had me thinkin' ya were Carmine," she said as she opened the
door fully.
Shirley came in, leaving Larry in the doorway. "Well, what other knock
would I use?"
Laverne gave Larry a questioning look, the turned to Shirley, still
holding the door. "Hey, Shirl, I know old habits are hard to break, but
ya gonna ask the poor guy in or what?" She motioned to Larry, who took
on a bit of a surprised look.
"Oh!" Shirley spun around. "I'm so sorry! I remembered about the tv
and the phone and thought he could help us."
Larry frowned. "Unfortunately, she keeps forgetting to keep that quiet.
Most people, if they heard about--" He quickly came in and closed the
door after, "--time travel would think you're nuts." He gave a somewhat
patronizing smile.
"Well, then we don't hafta worry about Lenny and Squiggy," Laverne
commented, then went over to retrieve the remote. She came back and
held it out to Larry. "This one first."
"Remote control," Larry stated. "Rather than having to get up and walk
over to the tv..." He paused, then took the proffered remote, and sat
way back on the nearest bed. "Like this." He hit the power button and
watched surprised looks cross the girls' faces.
Laverne broke into a grin. "I like that!" She plopped herself down
next to him, leaning over to look at the remote. "What else can it do?"
"Well, um... most anything: change channels, volume control, picture
brightness... that's all this one does. There's others with more
options," Larry explained.
"Lemme try," Laverne said, grabbing the remote from his hand. She
flipped around some channels, turned the volume down, then up, hit the
mute, hit mute again, turned the volume back down, and flipped a few
more channels.
"Vernie, play with it later, we're not done yet," Shirley said, crossing
her arms, still standing by the foot of the bed.
Laverne glared at her. "Kill joy." She jerked her thumb at the phone.
"An' the phone...?"
Larry glanced around her to look at the phone. He offered her a dull
glare, but Laverne returned a confused look.
"Laverne," Shirley broke in, "whaddya want him to do? Climb over you to
see the phone?"
Laverne shrugged. "Only if he wants to."
Larry's face flushed a bit. "I think..." He stood. "I'll just move
around to the other side." He went around and sat on the edge of the
opposite bed, near the night stand.
Shirley sat next to Laverne and slapped the back of her head. Laverne
glared at her.
"Ladies?" Larry said, clearing his throat.
"Sorry," they said in unison.
"Touch tone phone," he said. "No real difference between this and a
rotary, well, as long as you don't make a call that requires the pound
sign." The girls looked at each other, then at him, and nodded.
"Anything else?"
Laverne tapped the clock radio. "The clock...?"
"Alarm clock. You can set the wake time and the clock will
automatically turn on the radio station it's set on or a buzzer. Radio
is less obnoxious for the two rooms on either side."
"So," Laverne began as she slid off the bed and knelt in front of the
night stand looking at the clock, "how d'ya set it?"
Larry sighed. "When do you want to get up in the morning?"
"I dunno," Laverne said, then turned to Shirley.
Shirley shrugged. "I don't know, depends on what we wanna do tomorrow."
The girls began running off ideas of things they could do. Larry placed
one arm over his chest, held up his head in the other, and glanced up at
the ceiling, shaking his head. He could feel the headache beginning...
* * * * *
The next morning the radio came on in the girls' room, causing Laverne
to roll out of her bed and onto the floor. She sat up from her spot
between the beds and nearly came face to face with Shirley, who was
curled up in one corner of the bed, nearest to the night stand. Laverne
reached blindly for the clock. She found it, then realized she couldn't
remember how to turn it off. She looked at Shirley again to find she
was sleeping right through it. Laverne reached over and began shaking
her.
Shirley groaned, opened her eyes, looked at Laverne, reach over to shut
off the radio, then sat up, swinging her legs off the side of the bed,
and stretching them.
"Thanks, Shirl," Laverne said.
"No problem, Vernie," Shirley said, then paused. "Wait a minute,
where's BooBooKitty?"
Laverne shrugged. "I dunno, in the mess of pillows and blankets you
decided not to use while you slept?" She motioned to the mess on the
bed, then stood up. "Here, lemme help clean up." She tugged on one
blanket. "Are they tucked in somewhere?"
"No," she replied.
Laverne tugged again. "What the...?" She moved to the other side.
"Uh, Vernie..." Shirley began, as she watched her poke the mess... and
it shifted slightly. She pointed at the pillows at the head of the bed.
"In a minute, Shirl..."
Shirley shrugged, got up, and sat on Laverne's bed. "All yours."
"Thank you." Laverne tugged again, pulling the blankets of few inches,
then watched as they moved back to where they'd been. She frowned. "I
hearda bed bugs, but this is just ridiculous!"
Suddenly, the mess of blankets sat up...
"Vernie, can I speak now?"
"Uh oh..." Laverne yanked the blankets completely off the bed...
...And Larry prompty fell back over, then muttered, eyes still closed,
"Ten more minutes, Balki..." and tightened his hug on BooBooKitty.
"Well..." Laverne began.
"Laverne," Shirley said, sternly, "don't even."
"I wonder if Balki's lookin' for 'im," Laverne said.
"I wonder..." Shirley moved closer. "Is he alive?"
Laverne shook him. "Larry, c'mon, time ta get up. Let go-a the cat."
She glanced at Shirley. "An' I thought you were tough ta wake
up. He just ain't movin'." She paused, a grin crossing her face. "I
think I got an idea to wake 'im up..."
"Oh no! Vernie, I don't want to hear it."
"Then help me with my other idea." They both tried shaking him again,
to no avail. "This is interestin'."
Shirley sighed. "All right Laverne, what was you first idea?" Laverne
grinned. "So help me, Vernie... you don't mention any of this to
anyone, got it?" She leaned over and kissed him. She moved back
quickly and frowned at Laverne's Cheshire Cat grin.
Finally, Larry's eyes opened, and he glanced dully around the room,
until he saw BooBooKitty... and he bolted upright, tossing the cat at
Shirley. "Oh, my Lord..."
Laverne began laughing. "Wish I had a camera!"
"Laverne, really."
"Sorry, Shirley." She calmed herself. "Well, hey, now we can get a
start on figurin' out how ta get back to our own time."
Despite the embarrassing situation, Larry managed to compose himself,
somewhat. "Just... how do you plan on doing that? Could be a little
tough since you said you don't really know how you got here to start
with."
"Find the train we came in on," Laverne said.
"And just like that." Larry snapped his fingers, then gave her a
disbelieving look. He stood. "I have to tell you that, even though I
believe that you're from 1957, I'm find this whole time travel thing
hard to believe. I just don't see any real solution."
"Yeah? Well, as much as I'm kinda likin' this time, I wanna go home
where I belong. Ya know, where I have a home, a job, and friends,"
Laverne argued, moving closer to him.
"All I'm saying is that what happened to the four of you was some
mistake... a one in a million mistake and those aren't very good odds."
Laverne moved closer until she was face to face with Larry... and
realized she had to look down a little to look him in the eye.
Shirley slapped her free hand to her forehead. "Vernie, he's only
trying to rationalize our problem. That's no reason to pound him into
the floor."
Laverne paused, watching his eyes widen. "All right, Shirl. Besides,
ya know, he's kinda cute when he makes that face." She turned to face
Shirley and slung an arm around his shoulders.
He sighed. "Are you two always like this, or is there just
something about me that wants to make you torture me like this?"
"Could be worse," Laverne began, "Shirl has a tendency to make Carmine
take lotsa cold showers.
"Laverne!" Shirley hid her face in BooBooKitty.
A knock sounded at the door. Laverne went over and opened it.
Lenny and Squiggy came in. "Hello!" Squiggy said. "I hate hotels! I
can't just--"
Lenny tapped his shoulder and pointed. "Squig, the girls got company."
Squiggy walked over to Shirley, who was now looking up from her cat.
"Why wasn't we invited ta spend the night?"
"I'm gonna..." Laverne began, clenching her fists.
Shirley latched onto Squiggy's hair worm. "You never saw any of this,
you hear me?"
"Excuse me," Larry attempted.
"Let go-a my good curl!" Squiggy said. "You'll straighten it out!"
Larry turned and caught Laverne as she was about to join the fray. "Can
you stop this?"
"Sure." She shrugged.
"Then please do. I'd like to get this over with and go home."
Laverne grinned and patted his face. "No problem." She did a
two-finger whistle that caused Larry to cover his ears. "Everybody
shuddup!" She was met with silence. "Ya wanna get home or what?"
"Wait," Larry caught her arm, "can we go get Balki first?" He glanced
around at each of them. "I'm feeling a bit outnumbered."
* * * * *
(Close This Window To Return To LAS Fic)