True Colors
By Shotzette




"True Colors"
By Shotzette
Rated NC-17


This is a work of fanfiction, only. It is not intended to infringe upon anyone's copyrights, or intellectual property. This was written for grins and giggles, not dollars and sense. Besides, the suits at Paramount would plotz if they ever read this one.




This is a twisted little tale of Laverne and Shirley, as they were originally conceived. Not the lovable, comedic screwups we all know and adore, but their original conception--good time girls who were up for almost anything--and anyone. Unfortunately, neither ABC, nor Parmount was ready to back a show about two bimbos back in 1976. I'd like to think this is how they might be introduced today.

On cable, of course...




Shirley Feeney winced when-- probably despite Ritchie Cunningham's best intentions, the door knob hit her right square in the ass. Rubbing her decidedly sore, and rapidly freezing keister, she gave the Cunningham's front door a parting glare as she started to walk to her battered Pontiac.

She hadn't walked more than three steps when she froze in her tracks. What the hell was she doing? Was this how her Friday night was going to end? She hadn't driven all the way out to the west side--without even getting dinner, mind you--to have her evening ruined when her date's parents showed up. No, she thought, as her eyes spied the dim light and silhouettes on the windowshade in the room above the Cunningham's garage, she was definitely going to make tonight worth her while.

The sight that greeted her when she quietly opened the door to Fonzie's apartment didn't surprise Shirley one bit. Laverne was on her knees, as usual, hoovering Fonzie's cock for all she was worth. The object of her affection reclined on his sofa bed, his head thrown back, exclaiming random "aayyy"s throughout the act. That is, of course, until he saw her standing in the doorway.

"Shirl?" Fonzie said, with a puzzled look on his face.

"Mmmmf, no. Laverne..." mumbled the woman from his lap.

"I think he was talking to me."

Laverne made a gagging sound as Fonzie's member was quickly expelled from her mouth. She whirled around to see Shirley as she wiped her mouth with the back of her hand. "What the hell are you doing up here? I thought you and the kid were going to use the house."

"Ritchie's family came home all of a sudden."

"The Cunningham's are back?" Fonzie exclaimed as he quickly jumped off of the sofa bed and began to pull up his jeans.

"They're gonna ruin our night too?" whined Laverne, as she remained on the floor in her slip.

Shirley shot Laverne a withering glance. "Relax. Everything is fine, but my date with Ritchie is officially over."

"All right. Goodbye, then. See ya at home," Laverne said quickly as she pushed Fonzie back onto the sofabed and began to unzip his jeans.

"Well," Shirley replied, as she took off her coat. "I got kind of a problem now, Laverne. I really don't want to wait for you and Fonzie's date to be over. I mean, the car's freezing cold. But if Fonzie's be willing to drive you home, later tonight, all the way back to the east side, in the frigid cold..." Shirley stopped, as the crestfallen look on Arthur Fonzarelli's face, not to mention the rapidly softening cock in Laverne's fist; told her he would be more than open to her solution. "But, I think I have an idea you'll like." Shirley smiled her most seductive and kittenish smile as she slipped out of her cardigan and began to move towards the couple.

Laverne's green eyes widened. "That's not fair, Shirley. He's mine."

"Why Laverne, I'm sure Fonzie wouldn't mind if we...shared him." And it serves you right for shoving my face in the bathroom sink at Arnold's, Shirley thought to herself, though her smile remained sugary sweet.

"Fonz!"

"Eh, DeFazio. The Fonz don't like selfish women. It's sharing with Shirley, or no Fonz for you tonight. Got it?"

"Yeah," Laverne mumbled, while staring daggers at Shirley.

"Oh, Laverne! I'm so glad you agree," Shirley said, as she drew Laverne into a faux-spontaneus embrace. "Go along with it," Shirley hissed in her roommate's ear, "If he likes it, he'll call us more often."

Laverne's expression immediately brightened, as her hands flew to the zipper on the back of Shirley's dress. Shirley shimmied out of her spaghetti straps and let her good black dress hit the floor. She preened for a moment, allowing Fonzie to enjoy an eyefull of her in her black strappless bra and matching panties. Then, without breaking eye contact, she leaned in and kissed him deeply on the lips. His hand clutched the back of her head, drawing her in even closer as their lips and tongues writhed together at a faster tempo. Shirley smiled as she heard the sound of a zipper, and realized Laverne had resumed her ministrations. She prayed her usually over-zealous friend would take her time for once. This was the Fonz, for heaven's sake! She wanted to enjoy him for as long as she could. Besides, once he shot his wad, he'd kick them out.

Her attentions were drawn back to the here and now as she felt Fonzie's hands upon her. True to form, he managed to unhook all five hooks and had her bra in his hands in two seconds. She felt his start of surprise when she pulled back, allowing him to enjoy the view. Scooting back on the sofabed, her hands gripped the already rucked up hem of Laverne's slip and pulled it over her head. Shirley sighed as she eyed the safety pin in Laverne's bra with distaste. If any occasion had ever called for good underwear, this was as sure as hell it.

By the look in Fonzie's eyes, though, he didn't seem to care. Releasing Shirley completely, he yanked Laverne onto his prone form and his hands roamed her body aggressively. Shirley knew that he probably wanted her to take up where Laverne had left off, but she really wasn't interested. Though she'd never admit it aloud, giving head was Laverne's specialty, not hers. Besides, sloppy seconds weren't her style.

Instead, she quickly divested Laverne of her panties--so much easier since she wore them on the outside of the garters, and concentrated on touching them both. To be more precise, she touched Fonzie and made sure he was watching when she touched Laverne.

It amused her to see the famous Fonz as overwhelmed and excited as he was at that moment. A thrill ran through Shirley as she realized his eyes never left her's as he fondled Laverne's breasts. Laverne must have seen her out of the corner of her eye and realized what was going on, because the next thing Shirley knew, she was flat on her back with her roommate straddling her angrily. Laverne's eyes were flashing, but Shirley couldn't tell at that moment if it was from anger or arousal. "You pushed me too far, Shirl!"

Shirley bit her lip to keep from crying out as Laverne reached between their bodies and twisted her left nipple, hard. She was ready to haul off and slap Laverne, when she felt the bed suddenly shift. Laverne's eyes widened in surprise and her mouth opened in a gasp, as Fonzie's face became visible over her shoulder.

"DeFazio, I said to share," he murmured in Laverne's ear, as he began to thrust inside of her. A lightbulb flashed in Shirley's mind, and a calculating grin crossed her face. Well, if Laverne was in such a hurry to cum, she'd indulge her. And save Fonzie's strength for herself. She used Laverne's temporary distraction to her advantage, trailing her fingertips down the other woman's body as she teased Laverne's nipples into hard peaks. Laverne closed her eyes and moaned loudly, as Shirley felt her move more rapidly against Fonzie's thrusts. Shirley scooted further down under the couple, her fingers questing through Laverne's wet curls as her tongue flickered over a turgid nipple. By the pitch of Laverne's whine when Shirley's fingers found her clit, Shirley knew her roomate was halfway gone. Laverne's instant convulsions, and loud moan didn't disapoint her. Shirley twisted out from under Laverne's collapsing form as Fonzie pulled out; looking like he was torn between blowing his wad, and telling them to keep the noise down and not wake the Cunninghams.

A feral smile crossed her face as she sat up and firmly pressed Fonzie back onto the bed. By the sounds of Laverne's moans, she was still enjoying the aftershocks of her climax; and therefore, out of Shirley's way. Shirley kissed Fonzie's chest, allowing her nipples to graze his torso as she slowly worked her way up to his lips. It was the most arousing thing she'd ever done, dominating and controlling the great Arthur Fonzarelli. In his own bed, to boot! As she straddled his form, she pulled aside the damp crotch of her panties and allowed him to slip inside her easily. His hands came alive again, and began to caress her body as skillfully as she had Laverne's minutes earlier. Shirley's head lolled back, as she lost herself against the pounding sensation beneath her. As he gripped her buttocks roughly, she could tell he was close. Shirley swiftly began to finger herself as she desperately tried to cum before he did. She wasn't disappointed. As her tremors began, she felt Fonzie clutch her tightly to him, as he clenched his eyes shut and ground up against her savgely. She smiled as she felt him pulse within her, once again patting herself on the back for wearing her diaphragm, even though it was only a first date.

Shirley wiggled against Fonzie happily, as she lay against his chest, the sound of his heart nearly lulling her to sleep.

"Aaayyy," he whispered, as if about to nod off.

"Yeah, Fonz?"

"Can you and Laverne lock the door on your way out?"

"Sure, Fonz," she replied as she swallowed her bitterness. A glance to her right revealed a half dressed Laverne. "I had a great time."

His snore was her only reply.

*****

"I can't believe you thought he was going to ask us to stay over, Shirl!"

Shirley's jaw clenched angrily as her roomate's jackass-like bray filled the Pontiac. "Well, all I'm saying is that it would have been nice. That's all. Ritchie would have probably let me stay over."

"Yeah. That would have gone over big with his folks. Do I gotta say it again, Shirl?"

"I'd rather you didn't."

"When's your balloon gonna land? We went out, we had a few laughs--that's it. That's all they wanted, and that's all we wanted. Why do you always gotta make something outta nothing?"

Shirley remained silent and kept her eyes on the dark road. Not that she believed the crap coming out of Laverne's mouth for a second, by any means. Laverne didn't dream anymore, she probably never had. Life for Laverne was working at the brewery and enjoying whatever thrills that came her way; be it blowing their supervisor everytime she was up for a nickel an hour raise, or fucking Lenny Kosnowski at Inspiration Point after their weekly movie date. Laverne's life was simple and unimaginitive.

Shirley was different. She knew she wanted more out of life. She wanted a man who was rich and cultured. A man who could give her things a vibrator couldn't. An intelligent, educated man; who was probably a little tired of going home to the same woman night after night. A man who'd see all she had to offer and want to take care of her. Take her to nice, discreet restaurants, or, maybe the theatre. He'd buy her expensive jewelry, maybe set her up in a nicer apartment in the swankier end of town. She wasn't going to spend her life sweating over beer vats her whole life.

She had high hopes,damnit.

END










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