Freefall
By Shotzette
3/?
Rated R
Lenny burst through the door of Shirley’s apartment, eager to tell her about the old trunk that he and Squiggy had purchased at a swap meet earlier that morning. His excitement over his find, and the possible treasure inside was all but forgotten when he saw the sleeping figure on Shirley’s couch.
Laverne
DeFazio, in the flesh. Or, if not, showing enough leg curled around
the fuzzy green army blanket to make him want to bite his palm in
appreciation. Until of course, he
remembered he hated her. Lenny’s eyes
narrowed with anger as he remembered the pain of hearing about her and Carmine,
and the lesser pain of the right cross that she had delivered to his chin. With a smirk, he let go of Shirley’s heavy,
oaken door, allowing to slam noisily back into the jam.
Laverne
awoke suddenly, yelping in fright. Lenny
allowed himself to enjoy her discomfit before offering a sarcastic, “Good
morning.”
Her
green eyes flashed with anger. “You…”
she managed. “What the hell are you
doing here?”
“I
live here. Where’s your worse half? Stocking up on rubbers and penicillin?”
“Shirl!” Laverne bellowed. “Get down here!”
“Yeah,
Shirley,” Lenny echoed. “I think you’re
gone to have to have your couch de-loused.”
“Knock
it off, both of you,” was Shirley’s hoarse reply as she trudged down the steps.
“Why
is this creep hanging around?” Laverne asked, glaring at Lenny as she pulled
the blanket more securely against her exposed flesh.
“He
lives in the building,” Shirley answered dully as she headed into the kitchen.
Lenny
spared the petite brunette a quick glance, noting her reddened eyes and pale
face before turning on the former object of his affection. “You knew that me and Squig
drove Shirley out here when she moved, Laverne.
Or has your head been hitting the headboard of your bed so much that you
forgot that we didn’t come back?”
“Like
I would have noticed?”
Lenny
felt his face redden at her cold reply.
“That don’t explain why your keister is parked
on Shirley’s couch.”
Laverne’s
face twisted into what could have almost passed for a smile. “I moved in last night. Although, if I’d known you were here…”
Lenny’s
jaw dropped in shock. “Shirley wouldn’t
let you move in after what you did…”
“I
said, knock it off!” Shirley repeated. She exhaled a moment later, as if calming
herself down. “I’m sorry. I’m just very tired, and I know today’s going
to be a long day.” She turned toward
Lenny and said, smiling thinly, “Leonard, could you give us some privacy. Laverne and I need to catch up.”
Lenny
glared at Laverne balefully before replying.
“Sure, Shirl.
I’ll catch you later.”
Shirley
sighed as she watched Lenny lumber down the hallway to his apartment before
turning back to Laverne.
Her
former roommate was already on her feet, clutching the army blanket around the
short nightie that Shirley had loaned her the evening
before. “I can’t believe you just let
him barge in here like that, Shirl. You couldn’t stand that guy back in
Milwaukee.”
“He’s
not that bad, Laverne. Especially when Squiggy’s not around.”
Laverne
was not appeased. “He was kidding me
right? He and Squiggy
really don’t live in this building, do they?”
Laverne started to pace agitatedly back and forth.
Shirley
frowned slightly. “The boys have actually
grown up a little, Laverne. They started
their own business when they moved here, “Squignowski
Talent and Ice Cream”.”
Laverne
rolled her eyes and snorted. “Now I know
you’re pulling my leg.”
Shirley
shook her head. “No, really. The ice cream sales are doing better than the
talent agency end but they have signed some small acts and gotten their clients
some jobs. I know it sounds crazy, but
it seems like the boys—Squiggy in particular—have
found their niche.”
Laverne
looked thunderstruck. “That’s crazy, Shirl! People like
them don’t have niches. They just have
holes in the ground they crawl out of.”
Shirley
felt her patience start to slip. “I know
that you and Lenny parted on awful terms, Laverne…”
“That’s
an understatement.” Laverne shook her
head, as if in amazement. “You were
there, you know what he called me.” Her
last sentence was uttered in a choked tone the belied the emotion behind it.
Shirley
nodded, sympathetically. “Yes, and he
was horrible that day. He was also
hurt.”
“I
never promised him anything, I never lead him on,” Laverne muttered, as her
eyes focused on the floor.
Shirley
opened her mouth to retort, as memories of Laverne flirting with Lenny for a
stray favor flooded through her mind, but she then thought the better of
it. Besides, it’s not like she’d never
used that tactic on Carmine a hundred times over. Pushing away that unpleasant thought, and not
wanting to open that particular can of worms now, Shirley said, “I think you
two need to sit down and clear the air between you. You know the old saying, Laverne, “Make new
friends, but keep the old/One is silver, the other is gold”.
Laverne
smirked, and she once again wore the forced cheerful and flighty façade that
was starting to worry Shirley. “Lenny’s
more like zinc.” I just don’t want him
barging in here every five minutes like he used to do in Milwaukee, Shirl. I can’t live
like that anymore.”
Shirley
sighed as she realized that she couldn’t postpone all the unpleasant topics
that she and Laverne needed to discuss.
“Speaking of which, uh, we need to talk.”
“I
know, we need to divvy up the rent and utilities like we used to, and I need to
get a job, and…”
“No.”
Shirley said quietly, “It’s not about that.
Laverne, you’re my best friend in the whole world, you know that,
right?”
Laverne
grinned, “Yeah, and you’re my best friend.”
“Right. I love you like a sister, but…”
A
frown marred Laverne’s imperfect features, “But?” she repeated.
“Things
have changed.”
“Yeah,
we both moved to California, and you found a terrific apartment and a good job
and…”
“And
we’ve been living apart for six months.”
“What
are you trying to say, Shirl?”
Trying
to not react to her friend’s defensive tone, Shirley replied, “You can stay
here as long as you need to, Laverne, but…”
“But
what?”
Shirley
steeled herself, and said, “But after you find a job and can stand on your own
two feet, I want you to find your own place.”
Laverne’s
mouth opened two or three times before any sound came out, “But…There’s plenty
of room for the both of us here.”
“Yes
and no. “
“You’re
throwing me out?”
Shirley
shook her head vehemently, “No! I
just… I just… God, I didn’t want to have
this conversation with you today, Laverne.
It’s just that I’ve lived alone for six months…”
“And
now you don’t have to no more!”
Shirley
grasped Laverne’s hands in her own and willed her friend to comprehend. “I like it!
I like having my own apartment, Laverne.
I enjoy being on my own.”
Laverne’s
lower lip quavered and tears filled her eyes.
“It’s because of Carmine, isn’t it?
Because me and Carmine… You’re
still holding a grudge.”
Shirley
fought back a scream of frustration.
“No, I’m not. If I was, I would
have slammed the door in your face last night, wouldn’t I? I just really like living on my own.”
“I
don’t understand.”
Shirley
felt her own tears welling up as she cursed her own bad timing and Laverne’s
thick headedness. “I’m sorry,
Laverne. You can stay here as long as
you need to, and we are still best friends.”
She took a deep breath and tried to take as much sting out of her next
words as possible, “I just don’t want to be roommates anymore.”
The
long overdue words hung between them as Laverne sat down heavily on the
couch.
Shirley
looked at her wristwatch and grimaced.
It was nearly eleven, and she was due for her Saturday shift at Bardwells at a quarter till noon.
“I’m
late,” she muttered as she grabbed her purse off of the chair and headed
towards the door. She turned back to
Laverne and gestured to the kitchen.
“Laverne, the want ads are on the table, I have to run.”
Laverne’s
tear stained face looked back at her from the sofa, “But…”
“I
have to go,” Shirley repeated firmly.
“Listen, there’s a new barbecue place opening up down the road. Let’s have dinner over there tonight, my
treat. Okay?”
Without
waiting for a reply, Shirley was out the door and heading towards the bus stop
in minutes, her future ahead of her as she desperately tried to run away from
her now-intrusive past.
TBC